


Safe and Sound

by Sabitspooky



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Bottom Sylvain Jose Gautier, Depression, First Time, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Injury Recovery, M/M, Massage, Masturbation, Nightmares, POV Alternating, Roommates, Self-Worth Issues, Size Difference, Top Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-10
Updated: 2021-01-24
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:14:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 27,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26932699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sabitspooky/pseuds/Sabitspooky
Summary: Sylvain and Dimitri are best friends and roommates in college but an accident during summer vacation would set in motion a series of events that would bring them to discover these feelings of friendship might be something more.edit: I've upped the rating as I just added the final chapter which is pretty explicit. This chapter can be read solo if you so wish.
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Sylvain Jose Gautier
Comments: 2
Kudos: 46





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> H-hello, I'm finally posting my first few chapters after having them (probably) far too long. I needed another source to run them over because I'm nervous so my friend did a beta reading for me. This is my first multi-chapter fic with a single narrative and I want it to be perfect! I'm still writing the chapters but I figured I should put up what I've got so far.
> 
> As mentioned in the summary and tags this is an injury recovery fic. Dimitri gets into an accident and Sylvain (being his bff) is totally here to help him. I try to veer away from anything too gory or descriptive but I also wanted to make sure I was getting surgery recovery correct so there might be a little medical stuff related to eye surgery near the beginning two chapters.
> 
> Also this fic is totally an excuse to pepper in all my head cannons.

Sylvain's knee bounces anxiously as the small television on the other side of the room hummed with whatever talk show nonsense was on here. He wasn't really paying it any mind though, instead focusing on a bit of ripped upholstery on a neighboring chair. Ha, if they think nobody will see it because tucked underneath the chair, then they've got another thing coming. Maybe if he just keeps staring at it somebody else will pay it notice or time will distort around him and just go faster.

Maybe it's the fact that he's been up for some 27 hours straight, with over half of it being driving. Maybe it's the fact that all he smells is antiseptic and leather and it's turning his empty stomach. Or maybe it's just the fact that his best friend has been hospitalized, is in who knows what kind of condition, and he's here just sitting here in the waiting room not being able to do jack shit about it. Whatever it is Sylvain is either going to bounce his leg completely off his body or bore another rip into the chair with his piercing stare if there isn't any news soon.

Gosh, this is suppose to be a nice hospital, a high class hospital. Sylvain figures just as many people die in fancy hospitals as regular hospitals. The fancy ones are just better at covering it up, putting a nice clean smile on top of everything. Fuck, he needs to get his mind off of this topic again. Dimitri is a survivor, a champ! He's... probably doing better than Sylvain is at any rate.

Okay, Sylvain, get it to together. He takes a deep breath in, time to take this from the top, then, a deep breath out. He tries to trace back his last 16 or so hours. He's in a hospital some two states and 16 hours away from his apartment. He may have panicked just a wee bit after receiving a phone call from Mercedes that she heard through the medical grape vine that there was an accident involving the Blaiddyd family. Sylvain takes another deep breath before continuing his thought process. Everything is fine at home. He had enough foresight that he made sure to cross his t's and dot his i's when it came to work. A little phone call and his best distressing voice got him as much time as he need. Provided a real family emergency doesn't arise too soon or his boss doesn't ask you who died, how the funeral was, or how close he was to the deceased. See, perfectly under control.

If Sylvain is being perfectly honest. Nothing is under control, but that's never really stopped him before. All he knows is that he will go through hell and high water to be there for his best bro. Is it a little too dramatic to say that Dimitri is his everything? Maybe everything is being a bit too dramatic but Sylvain is very bad with words right now. The very thought of anything happening to Dimitri is honestly way too much to deal with at any time but especially now.

Honestly; though, when Sylvain said he was taking time off work for a family emergency it was a half truth. Dimitri is honestly more family than Sylvain's could ever be. Sylvain's parent's divorced when he was young and his mother had no real incentive to stick around in his life. Next, was his elder brother and... well maybe it's best not to dwell on that dark spot. Lastly, he cut ties with his dad when he moved out after high school, struck a life out on his own. Dimitri, bless his soul took him in when he was desperate for a room to get his footing. It was no secret that Dimitri's family was loaded with money and unlike Sylvain, he was still in a very good relation with his father.

It's now what, their third year in college. Between the excessive late night study sessions and stress planning for the final year of collage things were starting to look up. Sylvain got a stable job about a year back so now he can pay for his portion of the rent. Even if he had to beg Dimitri for the chance to pay it. If Dimitri got his way, Sylvain would never have to pay for anything in his life. Dimitri is just that good a bro. He's more than Sylvain ever deserved. That's why.... that's why....

Dammit, what is taking so long? If it's taking a long time, maybe they're in surgery. For what? If it's this long a wait maybe it's really bad. No wait, there's no way they'd still be in surgery... right? Then again, he's not a fucking doctor. Augh.

He realizes he's been aggressively chewing his bottom lip for the last roughly ten minutes when he suddenly hears the sound of his name being called.

“Is there a Sylvain Gautier here?” The nurse calls again in a slightly louder voice and Sylvain bolts to his feet.

“That would be me!” He didn't expect the sentence to come out quite that loud but he ignores it in favor of walking towards the nurse. At literally any other moment he would surely comment or even acknowledge a beauty like her because indeed she is beautiful. To probably nobody's surprise, his sleep deprived and addled brain can manage nothing now except for focusing on the words she's going to speak as if his very life hinged on these next words.

She must notice his state, surely, as she gives him a strange look before nervously tucking a stray blue lock behind her ear and continuing. “You're good for visiting now. If you'll just follow me.” He gives a couple rapid nods of his head and follows her down a hallway and into the elevator. When the doors close and nobody but the two of them are inside she speaks again with a sigh. “I've been asked to tell you that visitation hours should be kept no more than 30 minutes. He's been sleeping pretty deeply since he arrived last night and only recently woke up not long ago. He's currently awake but has been unresponsive.”

“Is he-?”

“No!” The quickness of her response startles the both of them. “That is his, body is physically responsiveness to stimuli but for whatever reason, he's adamant about not responding back to people.” She keeps her response fairly vague, fiddling with a clipboard she seems to hold onto for dear life. The elevator then shifts to a stop and the doors open. “You'll understand when you see him. Though for that reason, we're not sure how he'll react throughout the day and advise you not to stay long. He needs his rest, you understand?” Suddenly the nurse stops in front of a door that reads 620. “Well, I'll leave you to your visit now.” She walks off rather briskly leaving Sylvain alone in front of the sterile white door.

This is what Sylvain wanted wasn't it? What he drove 15 hours fueled by nothing but energy drinks and adrenaline for. A trip that was very well suppose to take 16 hours but somehow in his mad dash he was able to shave off an hour. He grips the knob. Why is he so apprehensive now? He takes a heavy breath as his grip tightens. Right. Nothing good can come from just standing here. With that, he enters Dimitri's room.

The room is fairly dark, curtains still drawn. There's all kinds of equipment softly humming and blinking in the room but nothing distressing in nature. His eyes locate Dimitri, sat straight up in bed, face turned away from him towards the covered windows. White bandages stick out in occasional spots of his disheveled blonde hair, probably some kind of head wrap.

Sylvain closes the door and moves closer to the bedside. Despite the raging storm inside of him, he attempts to mask the fear in his voice with some of his old fashion brightness he's so good at producing. “Hey Dimitri what's up?”

If Dimitri heard him, he made no effort to show it, so Sylvain moves himself around the end of the bed so he can try and get a better look at him. His head was indeed wrapped in bandages, specifically around his right eye. There were also dressing around other parts of his body poking out from his hospital gown, mostly his shoulders and upper torso.

A quick once over would give you the idea that nothing was that bad, at least externally speaking. However, Sylvain knows Dimitri, knows that this cold silence isn't him. The Dimitri he knows wouldn't sit here and not acknowledge him. He'd look up with his false smile and try and reassure Sylvain that he's okay. That Sylvain of all people should know these things happen. He might scold him on the necessity of being here. That was just how he was.

Not missing a beat, Sylvain takes a seat at the end of the bed and continues in some vain attempt at normality. “You gave me a real bad scare there buddy.” He laughs. “Drove straight through the night you know. Gonna be feeling it when the energy drinks wear off.” Even now the man in front of him refused to change. That didn't change anything though as Sylvain prattled on about how boring the waiting room was and how they needed new chairs in there.

He drove this one manned conversation the entire half hour, switching topics on a dime to whatever came to mind. Though fruitless, the act of talking itself relieved Sylvain, even if only a little bit. He stood up. “Well... the staff said I shouldn't keep you. Need your rest and all.” Moving over to the door, he stopped and turned back around to face Dimitri. Flashing a false smile he spoke back to him before leaving. “I'll make sure to visit tomorrow. Maybe not quite as early though.”

Sylvan made sure to close the door behind him as quietly as he could. So focused on the door he didn't see the other person standing outside of it until she spoke up.

“Mr. Gautier I assume?”

Sylvain looked up at her, now she was a pretty thing that looked so out of place in a hospital setting. More like a movie star than a doctor. Even her makeup seemed on point. “Doctor-” He scanned her coat and caught her name tag. “Casagana?”

“Casagranda.” Her expression sours and he can tell she's giving him a look over. “But please call me Manuela. Doctor Casagranda makes me sound like my mother.”

“In that case, call me Sylvain.”

“Alright, Sylvain. You saw his condition yes?” She pauses giving him enough time to nod before moving on. “Unfortunately we haven't a clue what is causing him to be unresponsive at the time. We're planning more tests just to be on the safe side since his vitals are all normal. There's also the possibility of it being a severe case of emotional shock as he was partially responsive before hearing the news of his situation.” She taps her foot impatiently in thought.

“You're awfully, helpful for a doctor Ms Manuela.” His tone is only a bit condescending as he eyes her. “Are you sure you should be trusting me with such delicate information? You don't even know who I am.”

The fact that Sylvain talked back to her in such a manner seemed to take her by surprise before she let out a hearty laugh. “I know you're on the list of pre-approved people to notify in case of an emergency so you can't be that much of a stranger.”

He was what? The idea surprised him but he kept that to himself and hoped the surprise he felt didn't give away in his facial expression.

“Yes, unfortunately, the accident being what it was, the first couple of choices have... passed away.” Her tone is somber as she states the last words. “We've notified Dimitri's uncle who was the next living contact and he's been doing what he can at the moment. We planned on calling you when we had more concrete answers so it surprised us to see you in our waiting room this morning.” She gives him this look like she wants to ask what he's doing here but must decide against it because her conversation topic changes. “So are you planning on visiting him again?”

“Every day, uh, if that's possible.” Sylvain realizes how silly that must sound but she just nods.

“We'll contact you if anything big happens. In the meantime, get some sleep and watch yourself on the way back. We don't need you showing up next in our hospital.”

“Will do, thank you.” He does a quick nod in her direction and she does one back before they part ways. The heaviness of his body hits him as soon as the elevator closes and he finds himself grabbing the bar so as to not fall. All the adrenaline must be wearing off. Dimitri is alive. He's not very responsive but he's alive and that has to count for something. He's becoming acutely aware of the burning in his eyes. They're most likely bloodshot and sore, probably a good thing he remembered to bring his glasses with him since he won't be going out much for the rest of the day in this condition anyway.

Somehow, he made it safely to his hotel. It was still a little too early to check in so he sat in the parking lot to pass the time. He was prepared to stay there for a couple weeks if he had to. Going back to their shared apartment now after seeing Dimitri like that would just worry him anyway. His stomach grumbled as if suddenly remembering the last meal he ate was 12 hours ago and he sighed. Maybe he could get something delivered. As he thought about it, his body let out a massive yawn, he wasn't even sure if his body would let him stay up long enough to eat. Whatever, that would just be future Sylvain's problem. His eyelids feel real heavy and surely a little nap couldn't hurt right? For now, he'll give in and let sleep claim him.


	2. Chapter 2

“Come on Dimitri, you heard the woman, keep those elbows straight.” Sylvain's chiding is playful as he suppresses a laugh. “Another two more and you can be done.”

“I- I am trying.” Dimitri's voice on the other hand is a strained almost sad whine. He holds the bar behind his back trying desperately to keep his arms straight as he raises it behind his back. “I was sure I had done enough of these. Are you sure your counting is correct?”

“Relax, Dima. Have you really given up on my ability to count to 10?” Dimitri can catch a glance of him putting on his best pout. However, Dimitri's known him long enough to know it's an act and ignores him.

He takes a deep breath and makes his way through his final two as the rehab facility instructor comes back over.

“Sylvain, go get some ice packs from the freezer. Dimitri, go take a break and ice your shoulders.” Her tone is just as monotone and authoritative as always as her eyes flit from one person to the next without missing a beat.

“You bet instructor Eisner.” Sylvain gives her a wink and a two fingered salute before heading off in the direction of the fridge.

“You're making very good strides towards recovery.” She puts one hand on her elbow and the other on her chin, a Byleth thinking staple as Dimitri has come to learn. “I suspect you'll be going home in no time.” Ah, this time she's smiled ever so slightly. “Not just recovery though, your mood has gotten lighter somehow too.”

“H-has it? I guess I have not noticed.” He feels a little sheepish being told this but then he guesses it wasn't hard to see his mood now compared to how it was when he came in. It was not like it was after the accident. That was....if he had to put it into words, unmistakably dark. If Dimitri could be honest with himself, it may have been the darkest moment of his entire life.

It was just suppose to be a nice quiet vacation with his family. Father had called him over the phone and said it would be a good time to talk more about him inheriting the family business. It being summer and with no job, Dimitri of course had nothing but time. They could talk about it while driving out to their vacation home.

He packed his things, said goodbye to Sylvain his college roommate of 3 years and best friend far longer than that, and was picked up by his father. He never would have expected it to turn out the way it had. A day or two into the vacation is when it happened. It must have been maybe 5 or 6 in the afternoon, traffic was heavy with people. They never saw it coming.

It felt like the air was immediately squeezed out of his lungs and it was hard to breathe. There was a crushing weight on his chest and the horrible crunch of steel and glass as the vehicle flipped and skidded to a stop. The last thing he remembered was the eerie stillness in the air before losing consciousness.

Next thing Dimitri knew, he was waking up alone to a dark hospital room. The beep and buzz of the machines hooked up to him his only companion. The first thing he noticed was that his body was almost unresponsive as if someone was sitting on him. It made sitting up too painful of an experience to attempt. Everything hurt. The next thing he realized only when somebody entered into his room. He could hear her approaching before he could see her. Why couldn't he see her right away? Surely it wouldn't have taken much effort to move his gaze to the right where the door led.

“Mr. Blaiddyd, if you are awake, please be aware that I am coming up on your left side.” Her voice was timid, with maybe a hint of nervousness in it. As she moved closer Dimitri could see her now. She was a small thing, blue hair all braided and tucked neatly into itself. The eyes that looked back at him were a nice soft brown which widened as she realized he was indeed awake. “O-oh you are awake!” Her voice was a almost a squeak. “If you will excuse me, I will be right back with the doctor.” Her shoes tapped against the floor as she fled his line of sight again and he heard the door open and shut.

Emptiness yet again. He started to focus on moving smaller parts of his body, his fingers, toes, ankles, ect. They all seemed to move as they should. He considered trying to sit up again before he heard the sound of talking outside of his door followed by people coming in.

“Mr. Blaiddyd, are you still awake?” It was an older woman's voice he heard. “I'm going to turn the lights on a bit, not too bright but enough to check and see how you're doing.”

The lights were still too bright, despite the dimness and Dimitri had to squint slightly. She entered his line of vision, initially not looking at him but at his chart. Her eyes scanned the document before glancing up at him then back down again. After she decided that was enough she handed it back to the blue haired lady from earlier.

She took a nearby chair and sat next to his bedside. “Mr. Blaiddyd, I am doctor Manuela Casagranda. Do you know where you are?”

“No.” The voice that came out of his lips was hoarse and quiet like it hadn't been used in years.

“Do you remember what happened to you?”

“I-” There are a whirlwind of emotions he can't seem to process right now as he tries to recall anything before settling on a response. “No.”

She looks him clear in the eye. Her lips are curled into a slight frown as if she's processing something. “I'm afraid there's really no easy way of saying this but you were in a car accident last night.” She pauses waiting for her words to sink in. “You're probably in a fair bit of pain right now and that's normal but know that you're doing well. However, the bad news is-” Again she pauses, this time longer and he notices her eyes shift slightly before she speaks up again. “You were, unfortunately, the only survivor.”

Air seems to freeze in Dimitri's lungs. All at once he can recall the feeling of the wind being knocked from his body the night before and all of a sudden it's harder to breathe. Manuela notices this and immediately behinds attempting to coax him down.

She lays a delicate gloved hand on top of his. “Now, now breathe deeply in and out. There we go now.” It's- understandable to be upset or cry. I promise there will be no judgment whatsoever in this hospital room. Doctor's honor.”

Her words were comforting and yet, this emptiness, this pit of tar currently filling Dimitri's chest. It's like he couldn't move, couldn't speak, or cry or feel in any way. How... how could he possibly process it all? All he could do was stare straight ahead, past her body towards the ceiling.

He could faintly hear her sigh. “Dimitri, take as much time as you need to process this. Your uncle has been notified of your condition and he's in talks with people right now about your future. We are going to do a quick examination of you for any complications. You're in good hands here. Marriane would you assist me please in helping him into a sitting position?”

“Yes doctor.” She approaches Manuela's side and while Dimitri had initially forgotten about her, he does little to even notice or care about her presence in the room. The two of them assist in pulling him upright as carefully as possible. Supporting his body in particular places and looking for any signs of pain.

“Are you feeling pain in any particular area of your body?” Manuela feels around at particular points of this body, watching his expression intently. Dimitri however says nothing though he clearly flinches when she presses into parts of his shoulder. She takes his silence in stride. “It's also normal to not want to talk about it and it's normal not to cry.”

Why can't he just, talk about the things he's feeling? The voice inside keeps telling him to keep silent, that it's not important. Let them fuss over you, let everything blow over. Forget this ever happened. No, how can he forget this ever happened. His parents, his future everything is... His grandpa once said that the most important thing to do in the face of adversary is to embrace it, consume it, and never let anyone be the wiser that it ever happened. Grow from it but never show it. His body is locked up, frozen in indecision and so he finds it easier to not say a word at all.

Dimitri barely notices that Manuela's hands are very close to his face before he refocuses and jerks at the now suddenness of it all.

“Whoa, whoa easy there. Easy Dimitri. I'm just looking at your bandages to make sure everything is fine. Your eye was injured beyond repair and you went through surgery last night to have it removed.”

His eye? The realization is finally starting to dawn on him. The thing he noticed when the nurse first came into the room. The doctor is inspecting the bandages on his head carefully and he becomes acutely aware that the fabric was even on his face. There is a sense of numbness to the area but no pain.

“Now these bandages will remain here for about a week, you're not allowed to get them wet so bathe carefully. After that we can remove them to check everything out to make sure there were no complications. You know oozing, discharge, and what have you. After that you've got another 2 months or so ahead of you to think about prosthetic options while your conformer is in place. It will be like wearing a big plastic contact on your eye for a while. We recommend wearing some kind of patch over your eye during this time. The good news is that once you have your prosthetic nobody will be the wiser that you're out an eye and you can go back to being the strapping young lad you are.” She smiles at this while giving him one final once over.

Dimitri takes in the words but doesn't really digest them or make any effort to respond. He watches as she moves away ahead and removes her latex gloves, disposing of them. She must be taking with the nurse again as he once again tunes it out and goes back into his head.

“I'll make these notes to his chart and we'll keep an eye on him while he's here. I don't expect there to be complications but it's always safe to er on the side of caution especially after an accident like his. Now Dimitri.” This time she seems to be directing her conversation back to Dimitri whether or not he's listening though is another issue entirely. “We are here to help you through this difficult time. Please, feel free to rely on us for any issue you have. We'll be in touch again later today to check up on you.” With that, the lights dim again and the two of them disappear into the hallway.

He's alone again. Back to the whir of machines in a dimly lit room. That was until he heard the door open. He wasn't sure how long it had been since the doctor and nurse had left, nor did he really care. Whoever it was did not turn on the lights or announce themselves so he found it equally fitting to not give them any recognition. When it did finally give itself away it was the person he least expected.

“Hey there, Dimitri.”

That was- Sylvain's voice! He was sure of it but-but there was no way Sylvain was here. A hallucination? The doctor did mention he was pretty doped up due to the pain. Yes that must have been it, a hallucination caused by his condition. Yet, a part of him wanted to look over, wanted to confirm that it really was just in his head. No , he wouldn't, he wouldn't-.

Suddenly, he was in Dimitri's field of vision. He was grabbing a the chair Manuela had sat in and pulling it close to the end of the bed. He sat down with a plop. “You gave me a real scare there buddy.”

Sylvain continued to talk. Dimitri continued to remain unresponsive. He couldn't think of a single thing to say. Where would he start? What could he possibly say right now? Words, sentences, nothing felt right to his mind. The process of thinking up a response only for his brain to nitpick it until nothing remained, until he felt stupid for speaking up at all. That's why he stayed silent. It was easy just to pretend he wasn't there at all paying attention to the words Sylvain said.

He doesn't quite take in or remember everything. He doesn't even remember when it was that Sylvain got up and made his way to the door. He does; however, remember those final words he spoke to him just out of sight. “I'll make sure to visit tomorrow. Maybe not quite as early though.” Then the sound of the door clicking closed.

Sylvain did indeed keep his word as he arrived the next day and the day after that. In fact every day he sat in his hospital, Sylvain was there too. The times changed from daily but he always visited. Maybe that's why the second day Sylvain visited Dimitri had decided to start responding physically by moving his head around slightly only when it didn't hurt him to do so. By day three was when Dimitri started to speak again, voice hoarse and weak as it was. The smile on Sylvain's face when Dimitri said hello back could have very well lit up the room.

Sylvain was still doing most of the talking but his company of more than Dimitri could have asked for. His humor was a welcome distracting from the current situation. As the week wore on his and his condition improved, visits were allowed to become longer and Sylvain often accompanied him out for walks around the hospital.

“Sylvain, truly, there is no need for your to visit me every day. It must be taking a burden on you financially to stay here.” They've reached a bench in the hospital park and Dimitri goes to sit down.

Sylvain only laughed back at him. “Dima, you worry too much. That is precisely why I need to be here. Besides somebody needs to give those poor beautiful women a break from you. Your nurse Marianne is awfully cute right? Do you think I could get her number?”

“Sylvain!” Dimitri's words are a chastising groan.

“No you're right, long distance relationships are hard work. Being away from such a beauty would only make my heart ache for the sight of her.” His hand motions are dramatic and Dimitri can tell he's trying not to smile while doing it.

“Honestly Sylvain, is that all you can think of?”

“What can I say, I am a hopeless romantic.” A real smile peeks out from behind the fist he's brought up to his mouth and Dimitri can't really stay mad at him. “Come on big guy let's get you some lunch.”

“Yes, let's.” The corners of Dimitri's mouth turn up ever so slightly into a smirk as he lets Sylvain help him up from the bench and they walk back into the hospital.

Later that day Rodrigue, Glenn, and Felix come in for a visit. They're the first people besides Sylvain and his uncle to visit him and it's a welcome surprise. He's glad they came to visit him like this and not, well, like he was before. It was nice to see them, even Felix was on fairly good behavior. When Dimitri brought up that Sylvain had been visiting him every day, Felix's eyes got wide but he quickly hid the expression behind a snide remark about how frivolous Sylvain is and did not talk much more about it.

Lastly Rodrigue told him about what was to be the plan for his parent's funeral. It was the first time since the day after the accident that anyone had even brought it up. Maybe they were all too afraid to face it, or maybe they were worried about how Dimitri would cope. It was to be a closed casket service that would be held after Dimitri got out of the hospital so he could be there if he so chose.

Dimitri did of course choose to go. Sylvain was still around so Dimiti asked if he could drive him there. Not that he didn't want to ride with his uncle and the rest of his extended family but somehow riding along with Sylvain made him more calm.

The service was very nice. It was at a beautiful funeral home in Dimitri's home town located half way between the hospital and their apartment. Afterwards they drove in a procession to the cemetery where they would be buried side by side. Even at the funeral Dimitri sill couldn't manage to cry. He stood stone faced, eye downcast as the lowered the first casket into the ground. He remembered Sylvain sticking to his side for the entire day.

It was late by the time the funeral was finally over and the two of them got a hotel for the night. Sleep didn't come easily to Dimitri that night as he tossed and turned in his bed all night.

Despite being out of the hospital they wanted Dimitri to stay at a closer rehab facility where they could offer him physical therapy and monitor his recovery. It was only an hour and a half away from the apartment so Sylvain visited as often as he could. They decided that it would be easier to name Sylvain as Dimitr's caretaker since they were roommates and he could easily help him at home. Therefore Sylvain sat in on all his exercise classes, today was no different.

“It's good that you have someone looking out for you.” Byleth answers back motioning to Sylvain who's returning with the ice packs. “The recovery process after an injury is usually a long one and it's easy to lose steam. The more support you have, the better.”

“Yeah...” Dimitri thought about all the friends he had. His history with Sylvain and Felix went back to elementary school and sure he was close to both of them but Sylvain was- Sylvain was a little different. For one, he was always looking out for him. Dimitri and Felix were both rather sensitive kids growing up but Felix had his older brother Glenn to look out for him and as they got older he only shadowed him more. Of course Dimitri had made other friends along the way but as they got older, life happened, people moved away, and there seemed to be less time to get everyone together; Sylvain was always there though. He was like a constant in Dimitri's shifting life.

There were many times he worried that he was taking advantage of Sylvain's friendship. He never asked Sylvain to go out of his way for him all the time and it made him feel ashamed that he took up so much of Sylvain's time. Sylvain would never hear of it though and took everything with a smile, that's just who he was.

Dimitri was so deep in thought that he didn't notice Sylvain sneaking up behind him until he felt the cold sting of a frozen ice pack on the back of his neck and jumped with a scream.

“Sylvain!!”

“I'm sorry, I just couldn't help myself. You space out, you pay the consequences.” As Sylvain started to laugh Byleth just shook her head and walked away with another smile on her face.


	3. Chapter 3

Today was the day, Sylvain thought. Dimitri was finally coming home from the hospital. Due to his lack of a right eye, it was easier to see when Dimitri was shifting to look at something on his right side. Sylvain caught Dimitri turning his head a lot on the car ride home and it reminded him of when they were kids. Though with Dimitri entertained, Sylvain didn't have to really hide the smile he got on his face. See it wasn't just the day Dimitri was coming home, Sylvain knew of the party he had planned for him too.

Somehow he was lucky enough to have gotten all of Dimitri's friends' schedules coordinated for Dimitri's release day. While he was away picking him up, they were back at the apartment getting everything ready. He hoped Dimitri would be excited. It had been all long time since he had seen most of them after all. Dedue and Mercedes had even promised to bring some of their homemade goodies. Just thinking about the delicious cake Mercedes must have made Sylvain's mouth water.

When they got to their apartment complex Dimitri made a move to grab his bag from the back seat before Sylvain stops him. “Ah, ah, ah let me get that for you.”

“Sylvain, please I am not that helpless as to not help bring in my own stuff.” His shoulders drooped in disappointed manner as he frowns.

“Uh ah, doctor's orders are to keep prolonged pressure off your shoulders so they can continue healing and that includes your overnight bag.” His hand darts out to grab the strap on Dimitri's bag before he can think about it again and hauls it onto his other shoulder before shutting and locking the car. “What kind of caregiver would I be if I just let you get away with these things?”

The two of them start making their way to the apartment elevators. “Well then, if you're going to be like that, at least pass me the keys so I can get the door for you.”

“Ooo lala what a gentleman.” He snickers a bit while they enter the elevator and Dimitri presses their floor button. “Sorry, I put them back in my pocket already.”

Sylvain would normally expect another sigh out of Dimitri for even suggesting he dig in his pockets but Dimitri just goes for it, surprising Sylvain. He's lucky that he has enough control over his body to force himself in place instead of jumping back. Dimitri's head is down so Sylvain has no way of knowing what kind of expression he's making. No, don't do this Sylvain. It's just his best friend rooting in his pants pocket for the keys to their apartment, don't make this weird.

It must have only taken a few seconds but it feels like forever as Dimitri retrieves them and quickly goes back to staring at his side of the elevator with an awkward cough as the two of them wait for their floor. Finally, the device dings and the doors open releasing some of this weird tension.

Dimitri turns the key to their apartment door with a click. Opening the door, he fumbles for the lights as he always does and suddenly as the lights turn on.

“SURPRISE!!” Dedue, Mercedes, Felix, Annette, Ingrid, and Ashe all jump out from their places behind furniture with a shout.

Dimitri is very temperately stunned before a massive smile erupts on his face. “You guys! What is everyone doing here?”

“It's a welcome home party silly.” Annette beams happily in such a way you'd think the party was for her.

“Sylvain told us all that you were due to be home today and it's been such a long time since we all got together.” Ashe's smile widened as he spoke up.

“Guys...” Dimitri's voice was so overcome with emotion he sounded on the verge of tears.

Sylvain tapped his shoulder lightly before that happened, and spoke very warmly with a smile. “Go enjoy your party big guy.”

He launched himself into the fray of people who flocked to him offering hugs in between his pleas to watch his shoulder.

Sylvain sits on the sidelines though, watching him from afar. Enjoying the smile that never leaves his face. Watches as he goes to try a little bit of everything that was brought to the party with people he hadn't seen in months.

Dimitri sits on the couch in between Ingrid and Annette who both have differing views on the kind of eye patch he should have. Ingrid says the basic black patch is great, that it makes him look like a pirate. Upon insisting that something be added to it though, Annette chimes in that a bit of color and maybe a friendly animal would help. While, Ingrid sticks firm to her belief that a skull and crossbones is the only way to go. Dimitri looks flustered that he can barely get a word in edgewise as the two girls debate the merits of the differing styles.

“Mercedes somehow your cakes keeps getting better and better.” Sylvain smiles after shoveling a mouthful of fluffy confectionery into his mouth. He's migrated around the perimeter of the room, still keeping a distant eye on Dimitri just in case he needs rescuing of course.

“Oh, Sylvain you flatter me.” She giggles ever slightly looking to where Sylvain's gaze occasionally lingers on Dimitri and then back to him. “How are you doing doing since we last spoke?” By which she means, since Dimitri's accident.

“Fine, doing great. Dimitri's been making great strides towards recovery you know. The doctor's say that with proper care he'll be as good as new in as little as a couple months.”

“Sylvain.” Her voice lilts in a authoritative tone only she can manage, coaxing him to stop talking. “I asked you how you are doing.” Ah, she's always been good about getting past Sylvain's bullshit to the root of things. “I didn't think you'd drive over the night I called you.”

“Of course I was going to- hey wait a minute how did you know I drove over that night?” He didn't remember ever mentioning it to Mercedes at all following that night. Admittedly, he feels he hasn't had much time for anyone other than Dimitri these past two weeks.

“Oh Sylvain, I have eyes and ears in every hospital.” She laughs again before going back to her easygoing smile. “Actually, one of my friends works at that hospital. She works the front desk so she sees everything that enters and leaves. She's the one who tipped me off about the accident initially. She was probably still working when you got there. She tends to come off as a bit excitable. Blonde hair with purple highlights.”

“Ah, her.” He sighs. “I remember her.” He remembers her eyes wide as saucers as he staggered to the front desk. The first thing she asked him is if he was checking himself in because he looked terrible. His conversations with her at later occasions were generally more pleasant. She was fairly bubbly for someone of that position, loved to laugh, and she always greeted him with a tight smile when he came by to visit Dimitri.

“That explains it. Yeah, after you called me, I panicked and drove over to the hospital. What else was I going to do? Those first 24 hours I was a mess even Dimitri's own doctor could see it.”

“You could have gotten yourself killed driving all night with no sleep.”

“I guess, in the moment I wasn't thinking about myself at all. I only realized the kind of shape I was in after all the adrenaline in my body gave out and I passed out in the hotel parking lot.”

“Please don't do that again Sylvain.” Her voice was very stern. “Can you imagine Dimitri having to go to your funeral too after all that's happened to him?”

“Ah, so you know then?”

“Felix told us about the funeral. He wanted to make sure everybody knew because he didn't want anyone bringing it up today. Looking at the smile on Dimitri's face, I can't blame him. But again, what about you Sylvain?”

Sylvain looks back in Dimitri's direction from where he's escaped the girl's clutches and is further away talking to Dedue. As they lock eyes Dimitri gives him a bit of a smile and it forces his gaze away. Yes, what about him? “I don't know.” He pauses. “Maybe, I think seeing Dimitri gain his footing again has helped me too, you know. When I see him happy, it makes me happy. Makes me feel like I'm being-” worth a damn is what he wants to say but settles on “-helpful.”

“Do you remember the time back in high school when I broke my arm?” Technically it was when Miklan broke his arm, Mercedes knows this but neither will she correct him either. She nods back at him. “When I got back to school, everyone was there to surround me and get my mind off of it. It was easy when we were kids. We saw each other every day whether we wanted to or not. These days...” He looks at the room full of people. Seeing them reminds him of his youth. It brings him back to that moment as a teenager. “He was all alone in that hospital so far from everyone. If I could be there for him, just a little, if I could bring him just a fraction of what he's shown me over the years I told myself it would be worth it. The drive, the stress, everything.”

“Is that really the only reason?” She's side-eyeing him over the rim of her glass, catching him once again in the act of watching Dimitri.

“I don't know what you could be talking about.” Sylvain says brushing off her accusations as if it wasn't obvious he was staring.

“Oh, it must be my imagination then.” Though the way she smiles, Sylvain knows she's only putting off the topic temporarily. “If you ever need to get anything off your chest, you've got my number. I'm more than happy to listen.”

Sylvain doesn't get a response out before Ashe is waving Mercedes to come over to the location where him and Dimitri are now talking about something. “If you'll excuse me Sylvain.” She walked off, leaving Sylvain alone with his thoughts.

Dimitri was Sylvain's best friend. Best friends were expected to bend over backwards for each other in times of trouble. Is it so odd to take a week off so you can visit your friend in the hospital every day? And Sylvain is nothing if not the best friend a person could have. This feeling bubbling in his gut is a byproduct of stress and nothing else.

When they were younger Dimitri always invited him over to stay at his house when things got bad at home. Sylvain just offering him what he has, which is his time. It's probably the only thing Sylvain has to offer.

He doesn't have much time in his mind when Felix stomps up to him with a stern tone of his own. “Sylvain, did you really take a week off work to bunk in a hotel near the hospital Dimitri was staying in?”

“Whoa Fe, you spooked me.”

“Answer the question Sylvain.” Despite his shorter stature his eyes bored with the intensity of a person looming over him and Sylvain knew he couldn't sidestep Felix like Mercedes would let him.

“Yes, I took a week off of work. Look, I talked it over with my manager, it's not like I didn't prepare. How did you find out?”

“Dimitri told me when we visited him in the hospital.”

“Ah.” Sylvain remembers Dimitri telling him Rodrique, Glenn, and Felix came to visit on day. “Are you here to chastise me too?”

“No, I'm just confirming you're really as stupid as I thought you were.”

“Ouch, Fe. Words hurt too you know.”

“I wasn't going to say anything about it but you've been making googly eyes at him all night and it's making me sick.” Sylvain opens his mouth as if to say something but Felix butts in immediately causing him to close it again. “Don't do that thing you always do and deny it. I saw you. You are insufferable Sylvain. You push yourself harder than anyone here for the people around you. How you manage to do so much, but notice so little is beyond me.”

“Notice what?” Sylvain starts but Felix is already shaking his head.

“When I talked with Dimitri in the hospital, he did nothing but talk about you. You're closer to him, I've known that for a while now but, whether you realize it or not, you've got this effect on him. He listens to you more.”

“What are you trying to say Fe?”

“I can tell you're going to do something stupid again. Don't.” Like most conversations with Felix, it was over before it really started as he walked away from him without any rebuttal from Sylvain.

Throughout, the remainder of the night Sylvain and Dimitri seemed to constantly catch each other's gazes. Earlier in the night Dimitri would smile back at him as if acknowledging it but as the night wore on, his response was became more shy as he quickly shifted his eye back to his conversation partner. Both responses would caused Sylvain to pause longer than he probably should have. To acknowledge his gleeful smile and that maybe the twisting in his stomach wasn't just the byproduct of digestion. That when Dimitri laughed, he laughed loud and it was a sound Sylvain wanted to commit to memory.

There was no way this was happening. Sylvain was suppose to be a pillar for Dimitri during his rehabilitation and none of his stupid bodily functions would get in the way. So he did what he always did and ignored them. This isn't about him, this is about Dimitri. He had to get this right, he told himself, at any cost.


	4. Chapter 4

Their days since the party have been routine, and honestly Dimitri thinks it's very nice. Something about the way Sylvain is too eager to help Dimitri get up in the morning with breakfast before he has to leave for work to the way he always practices Dimitri's exercises with him when he gets back home feels wholly different from before.

It's not as if Sylvain has never shown this kind of attention to him before, it just feels like a lot more now and for seemingly no reason. Maybe it's because of the accident that Sylvain has become more worried about Dimitri's state. Sylvain hardly ever ate breakfast before work, let alone take time to wake up early to make it. Whenever Dimitri had given mention to it Sylvain just smiled at him and told him that it was important to keep up his strength during recovery. Though, he's sure Dedue would have some choice words over the helpfulness of all the cheese dishes Sylvain had been feeding him.

Today he's found himself pacing around the apartment absentmindedly. The sitcom on tv is all but forgotten as Dimitri wanders in search of something productive to do in the short time before Sylvain comes home. Something inside of him tells him he needs to be more helpful when Sylvain is away even if he's been told constantly to not strain himself cleaning the house. What to do though? Dishes have been through varies stages of washing, sitting, drying, and putting away and he's picked up the living room already.

He doesn't remember being this bored waiting for Sylvain to come home in the past. Everyone else is probably also still at work too so he gives up any idea of texting someone and goes back to laying on the couch with a heavy sigh. This is silly, Sylvain would laugh at him if he could see him right now. He tries to empty his head and just watch tv to pass the time but it's no use. It would be nice if he had a hobby but all the things Dimitri likes that could be considered hobbies usually took more than just one person. For example, he liked watching Sylvain play video games, Sylvain always had a board game for the two of them to try out, and Sylvain's commentary on trash television was something Dimitri enjoyed.

Sylvain.... he mulled over his best friend's name in his head. Had something about him changed recently to make Dimitri feel this impatient? A lot of things about Dimitri and his world had changed, that was for sure. However, Sylvain's presence in his life wasn't one of those things. It was something Dimitri thought about constantly these days. Why was Sylvain always so nice to him? Sylvain always gave him the same cookie cutter response about responsibility and friendship when he asked so Dimitri stopped asking.

Dimitri remembers though, at the party, whenever he looked up it was like Sylvain was looking at him. At first, he thought nothing of it and waved back with a smile. An affirmation that he was having a good time. That's Sylvain's efforts to get everyone together was not in vain. Throughout the night, his thoughts changed with every glance that connected. In a room full of people it was like Sylvain was watching him and him alone.

How should he take this kind of behavior? He knew he was the star of the party but the weight of those brown eyes on him was different from all of his other friends around him. No, he was just misinterpreting it. Sylvain was surely just being vigilant. His behavior would be no different if it was another friend. Yet, when he starts to think about it that way, his heart aches in a way he can't describe.

There's not enough time to dwell on it as he hears the click of the lock and it seems that Sylvain is home. “Welcome back, Sylvain.” He says without moving from his spot as he hears the door open and close followed by the rustling of plastic bags being set on the counter.

“Have you been watching tv all day?” His tone is clearly teasing as he chuckles but Dimitri flusters anyway.

“I have-!” Dimitri starts before Sylvain cuts him off.

“I know, I know. How's your shoulder today?”

The question causes him to pause. He hasn't really thought about it much today which should mean it's not bad then. “Uh, good.”

“Good then. I've picked up some stuff for this week's meals.”

“You know Sylvain, I would have said yes if you asked me to go shopping while you were away at work.” He doesn't drive, but in the city, especially a college town, he knows it's easy to get rides to places if he needed them.

“I couldn't have asked you that. I don't want you carrying those heavy bags all by yourself.”

“Then I will not get anything heavy.”

“Dima, you and me both know you have a bit of a habit of picking up extra stuff.”

“Then we should both go and then you can help carry the bags for me.”

Where Dimitri expected Sylvain to quip back, there was silence and for that moment Dimitri had thought he said something wrong. Before his thoughts spiraled, Sylvain laughed.

“Okay, I get it, I get it. You want some time out of the house. We can... go together if that would please you.”

“It would.” Dimitri smiles to himself as if he's managed some kind of victory. Sylvain's freckled face suddenly appears in his vision and feels very close as he leans over the arm of the couch and looks down at him.

“Have you done your exercises yet?”

“N-no, I have not yet.” Why is Dimitri nervous all of a sudden? They've been through this song and dance before.

“Okay, give me a second to change into some more comfortable pants and we can start, yeah?”

Dimitri nods back, unable to do much else. “Yeah.” Since Dimitri's been home all day he's already in suitable workout clothes, a slim-fitting black tee-shirt and blue plaid pajama pants.

Sylvain leaves him once again to head into his room. When he gets back, he's changed into a pair of gray sweatpants and is now wearing his square frame glasses. Sylvain only seems to wear them at home when it's just the two of them. It's always been something Sylvain has been a little self consciousness about. Something that happened to him as a kid that he never felt the need to expand upon. Dimitri gets the feeling he's always known the cause though. After all Sylvain's elder brother, back when his brother was still around, was never really the nicest to him.

“Ready?” Sylvain extends a hand towards him on as if to help him off the couch.

“Uh, yeah, yes. Thank you.” Grabbing his hand, it feels so warm and he foolishly forgets he was suppose to get up as he's jerked off the couch by the other.

“Let's start with some across the chest stretches okay?”

Even though, Sylvain doesn't have to participate, he stretches along anyway. He's told him when they first started that it couldn't hurt to get some extra exercise in. It might even increase his flexibility. Dimitri remembers him saying it with one of his classic Sylvain winks and Dimitri absolutely rolled his remaining eye.

Sylvain counts down a minute, as they hold their arms straight out across their chest other hand on their elbow, a byproduct of all the spotting he did when he helped during rehabilitation therapy. “3, 2, 1 and switch.”

They do this for a while. Switching arms after the minute is over. Sylvain's voice is so soothing. In between exercises he asks if Dimitri is feeling alright still and Dimitri responds on autopilot with a yes. The way Sylvain says the word good, it feels as warms as his hands did and he smiles without realizing it.

They move on to chest expansion exercises next. Dimitri holds a spare towel with both of his hands behind his body. Sylvain helps him with his form as he moves his shoulder blades towards each other, broadening his chest, and lifting his chin. He feels Sylvain's hand on his chest for the entire 30 seconds of hold time. Dimitri thinks his shirt has never felt thinner as he feels the other's warmth again. After time is up, he removes his hand with a slight pause. Their eyes meet.

Sylvain coughs awkwardly. “Yeah, like that. Your form is getting better. Let's do another 4 more of those.” He goes to get his town towel and work on his own separate from Dimitri.

It's getting harder and hard to dismiss the looks he's getting as they continue exercising jumping from one form to another and he feels like he's back at the party again. His body arches as he presses his weight against his hands, lifts his hips towards the ceiling, and concentrates on keeping his back straight as he does his downward dog position. This time he refuses to make any contact with Sylvain, but he's almost certain Sylvain is staring. At the very least he can hear the unmistakable quiver in Sylvain's voice when he begins to count down. No, just focus on keeping this position held he tells himself.

The count reaches zero and he slumps back into his starting position and breathes out a bit of air he had been holding onto. Great just like a few more of those right? The next few pass with roughly the same tension and as the last count reaches zero, Sylvain sounds almost breathless.

“Alrighty, just one last pose to end the session. It's that nice resting pose. The child's pose I think it's called. You still doing good?”

“I did not think these exercises would take this much out of me. But yes I am fine.”

“Right.” The fervor in his voice has quieted down now but there's still no way that Dimitri can see him due to Sylvain being on his blind side. “I'm setting an alarm for this one since it's a long hold. Let me know when to start the timer.”

“Okay.” Dimitri starts in downward dog, bending his knees, and sinking his hips down into his heels. Arms extended his feels his forehead touch the floor, his knees reach his chest, and as he breathes out relaxes his spine and shoulders. “I am ready.”

“Y-yes. Starting the timer.” They sit there in absolute silence for the next five minutes.

Without a phone himself, Dimitri has no idea how long has passed. He tries to clear his head of all the thoughts fighting their way to the top. Tries to forget about the breathy way Sylvain was talking. About how much warmer he probably is now. He tries to not think about what's going on between the two of them these days. How much closer they've gotten in the short time since the accident. Unfortunately, it's no more possible than it would be for Dimitri to suddenly get his sight back in his other eye.

He finds himself wondering what exactly Sylvain is to him. Are they still just good friends? Have they slipped into becoming something else? What does Sylvain really think about him? Maybe he's misinterpreting things where there isn't anything. There's no way Sylvain could really...

“Sylvain?” His meek voice cuts through the stillness in the room like a knife.

“Yeah, buddy?” Ah, his voice is back to what it's normally at.

“I--I want you to know that-that everything you have done for me it means so much to me. Not just the things after the accident but maybe everything. I--what I mean to say is that I want you to know how much you mean to me as a person. Your companionship has helped me a lot growing up and I don't know what I'd do without you. Sylvain, thank you for being with me.”

Sylvain is so speechless and initially panic starts to rise in Dimitri that he's said something wrong. The words that come next are no less worrying. “It's no problem Dimitri. It's what friends do right? Anyone would do the same for you in my position.”

“Y-yes you are right.” Maybe he is overthinking things. He will not press the issue any more. The timer suddenly goes off and as he finally turns his head to look at Sylvain, Sylvain is already up and walking towards the kitchen.

“Let me go get some ice packs for your shoulders. It's good to cool off after stretching after all.”

“Yes, right.”

“Here catch.” Dimitri barely catches the bags of frozen produce that they use for ice packs. “If you don't mind, I'm going to take the first shower. All that effort really worked up a sweat and I've had a long day at work. After that you can take yours while I work on dinner. That sound good to you?”

“Yes, that is fine with me.” He watches as Sylvain makes a beeline for the bathroom. As he brings the bags up to his shoulders he wonders again just what is going through Sylvain's mind. After all, he didn't even wrap these frozen bags in a towel.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's the chapter that's got masturbation in it near the end.

This is bad, Sylvain thinks to him himself. This is really bad.

The water in the shower is absolutely frigid but Sylvain finds it overwhelmingly more preferable to the raging hard on he has. His body shivers as he covers his face in his hands. “Go away boner, you literally cannot be here right now,” he mutters to himself.

Being that close to him was overwhelming enough, he should have thought better than to keep going with the routine. Downward dog has been the bane of Sylvain's existence since they started those stretches and every time they do them, it gets worse. What started out as a flutter grew into a pounding turning his chest into a drum.

Sylvain always exercised on Dimitri's blind side so he could keep an eye on his form without Dimtri knowing. He told himself it was perfectly reasonable to make sure the stretches were done properly. Except that, without the threat of being caught, he found himself looking a lot more often than he needed to. It didn't help that the sight of Dimitri's body arched in a perfect triangle, ass straight in the air, was something he absolutely couldn't turn his eyes away from.

He smacks himself in the face to stop his mind from wandering back to Dimitri's sculpted ass. No, he has to be productive and make dinner after this. Dimitri doesn't need this right now.

Through sheer willpower (and plenty of freezing water) eventually he gets his body to settle down enough to finish showering and be done. After shaking the water from his hair he wraps his body in the nice large towel like a cape because he's feels like he's gonna die from hypothermia.

“Shower's all yours buddy!” He yells in the general direction of the living room area.

“Yes, thank you Sylvain.” Dimitri's voice comes up from behind him and it damn nears scares him. Dimitri must have been hiding in his room.

The way their apartment is set up has the bathroom located at the end of the hallway and on either side of that are both bedrooms. Most of their time is spent shared in the living room with their bedrooms pretty much just being places for sleeping.

Dimitri hardly ever uses his and yet it's always a mess. Sylvain enters his own room and shuts the door behind him. Sylvain's room, on the other hand, is very pristine. Everything is put in its place, not even a shirt on the floor. He got in the habit of keeping his room clean when he was younger for a laundry list of reasons. Other people can keep their spaces however they please but Sylvain needs his in order. He can tell if any of his stuff has been messed with, not that Dimitri would ever mess with his stuff but by now it's just something that's been ingrained into him.

He gives his hair another shuffle with the towel and tosses it into his laundry basket before finding something loose and comfy to wear for the remainder of the evening. Now what to do for dinner?

Sylvain plods out into the kitchen and starts obsessively checking cabinets and the fridge. He's not in the mood to make anything extravagant, not that he really can. Sylvain is good at simple cooking, boiling noodles, popping pre-made shit in the oven, microwaving things whenever he can. Lasagna is about the fanciest thing he can cook. Honestly they eat a lot of noodles and cheese in this house. Dimitri loves cheese so just about all of their dishes include them in some format.

He spies a half used box of spaghetti noodles and so Sylvain decides spaghetti it is as he goes to start boiling water. Despite his desire to push every bit of problematic emotion down, he can't help but dwell on Dimitri's choice of words while exercising earlier. He called Sylvain his companion, now he couldn't have meant it like that, right? The two have been thick as thief from the day they met but Dimitri he can be so tactless sometimes. You can't just call your best friend your companion, it would be like calling Sylvain his partner. A slight shiver ran down his spine at even thinking about that word.

Sylvain tosses the noodles into the boiling water to get his mind off of it, if only for a second. Goddess, he's terrible at his. No, that's not what's going on, but at this point a nagging feeling in the back of his head tells him it might not be so bad if it was. Sylvain brain suddenly thought the most dangerous five words: 'what if Dimitri likes me?' These were followed immediately by: 'what if I like Dimitri?' He instantly drops the wooden pasta fork into the pot as his body seizes up. What if, he does like Dimitri?

These thoughts are too heavy for him to deal with in the kitchen. He grabs the fork back up to continue stirring as he waves them away. “Brain, you've lost your thinking privileges today,” he says with a sigh as he gets out his phone to find something to listen to. Music will clear the muddy waters in his head, for now anyway.

Dinner went fine, so long as Sylvain didn't look at Dimitri straight on, didn't try to notice Dimitri's damp golden locks that the other took almost no effort to manage, or the way Dimitri still at the ripe age of 21 used a spoon to aid his fork in twirling the noodles onto it like a child. It was endearing and dare he say it, cute. No wait, he's not suppose to think anything Dimitri does is cute. It wasn't cute that Dimitri tried so very hard not to get sauce on his clean shirt but somehow ended up covered in it anyway, and it certainly wasn't cute when Dimitri pouted after trying to cut a meatball in half and instead it shot off his plate and onto the floor. Sylvain will certainly not think about his smile when he gave him one of his meatballs (already cut in half of course) to make up for the one that escaped.

After dinner, Sylvain turned to video games to get his mind off of Dimitri. He booted up some game he started playing earlier in the week as Dimitri plopped onto the couch behind him to watch. His brain would have no time to think of anything else as he dodged and parried his way through combat. Evenings were like this a lot, Dimitri either watching in amazement or actively involved in helping him through his games. Dimitri said he wasn't interested in games, and yet he always found his way into the living room when Sylvain started playing.

Everything was going so well. It was only natural he'd bungle something up again before the night was over and of course he did. As they were returning to their rooms for the night, Sylvain reminded Dimitri of his soiled shirt. “You're not wearing that to bed are you?”

Dimitri gave him this look before looking at his shirt and remembering he got sauce all over it. “Ah, I guess I am not.” Without a second thought, he pulled it over his head and the shirt was off. Dimitri then a move as if to toss it on the floor with the rest of his mess.

Sylvain had seen Dimitri without a shirt about a hundred times but his poor mind was way too overloaded for this tonight. “W-wait not on the floor!” He raised his voice in panic. “It'll never get washed if it goes there.”

“Er, yes you are probably right.” Dimitri looked a little guilty at being called out.

“You need to really clean your room, Dima. At least get those clothes off the floor. Not now.” He added as Dimitri almost bent down to pick up a stray sock. “Can I have you do laundry when I'm at work tomorrow?” He was really trying to keep his eyes off Dimitri's bare chest. “I'll leave you some quarters in the morning for it alright?”

“Yes, I think I can do that.”

“Take it down in small loads so you're not carrying too much okay?”

“Sylvain, you worry too much.” He paused slightly as if contemplating something. The next words he spoke were much softer. “But, also I'm happy you worry about me.”

Oh no. Sylvain felt his heart thump in his chest.

“Truly, I do not know where I'd be without you worrying about me.”

This is bad. He knows he shouldn't look but he does anyway. Their eyes catch and Dimitri smiles, a faint dusting of pink on his cheeks. Sylvain is now staring, goddess, he's staring.

“Goodnight Sylvain.” Dimitri turns and goes into his room, shutting the door behind him, and leaving Sylvain at the mercy of his invasive thoughts. He quickly retreats into this room, shutting, and locking the door behind him.

'What if Dimitri likes me?' and 'What if I like Dimitri?' spin and whirl about his head once again as he sinks to the floor, back against the door. There's no way, no way Dimitri could be interested in him. He really shouldn't. It's getting harder and harder to refute that voice in his head though, this feeling in his gut that he's had ever since the party, maybe longer. Sylvain thinks he may have fallen in love with his best friend.

He thinks about Dimitri and every heated feeling from earlier leaps back into him with a vengeance. Thinking about the way Dimitri smiles at him, his body is hot and worse than that, he's getting hard again. There's no use fighting this now, Sylvain is tired. Tired of fighting it, of denying it. Maybe tonight he'll just...

Fingertips ghost the tented fabric of his sweatpants, teasing at the tip and he shutters. He's not in the mood to do any intense cleaning or even leave his room, so he'll stick to his hand tonight. It will be plenty enough for his disgraceful deed tonight. His fingers rub circles around the spot, getting more and more bold in their pressure, and his breath falters further.

Part of him wants to get this done and over with as quickly as possible but another part of him can't seem to concentrate either. He snakes his other hand up his shirt and starts to play with his nipple. Dimitri would be so careful of Sylvain's body, so delicate. Maybe like this? As his mind plants that idea in his head, he groans ever slightly. Would he comment on Sylvain's state? Would he be impressed?

“Sylvain, you're so sensitive.” Fantasy Dimitri speaks to him in a low and heated voice. Sylvain would let him touch him anywhere he wanted. He'd never deny Dimitri of that.

His mind's becoming unreasonable again as he imagines Dimitri kissing his collarbone, up his neck, and along his jawline. The very thought causes him to gasp as he touches himself even harder against the fabric. His hand slips under the band of his pants and over his boxers to feel himself better. He's damp and quite thick now. Imaginary Dimitri sucks hickies into the side of his neck and he wants so badly to run his fingers though that blonde hair, to gently work out the knots, just so he can mess it up again. His lips quiver at the thought of losing himself in Dimitri.

Sylvain has to bring his hand away from his chest and up to his mouth to silence the mewls and moans when he finally touches himself skin to skin. His thumb traces along the head, smearing precum everywhere, using it to slide along his shaft, and slick himself up.

“Dimitri.” His voice is a hot whisper as his fingers wrap around his length. What does Dimitri's mouth taste like? Sylvain would want nothing more than to kiss up his chest after working up a sweat, to be so close to him and really breathe him in and taste him. His hips buck into his hand over and over again feeling the pleasure of finally giving in. It's not he most lubricated session he's ever had but he's worked himself into a frenzy and frankly stopped caring quite some time ago.

Fantasy Dimitri won't stop spoiling him with kisses all over his body. Everywhere his lips touch is hot and Sylvain has never yearned for more in his life. To be showered in his affection, his heart races at the thought and his body pushes forward. He feels his orgasm rapidly approaching. “Dima, please.” Heat rapidly coils throughout his body and he's finding he has to bite into his fist to stop himself from crying out too loudly as he shoots his spend all over his hand and underwear.

Sylvain is delirious in his post-orgasm state and his body now feels sluggish and unresponsive. However, once the fog of bliss clears, he groans again. He shouldn't have done that. He totally and absolutely rubbed one out to his best friend and he shouldn't have done that. How will he be able to face Dimitri tomorrow? He can't, he absolutely can't! The hand that's not completely covered in his own sticky mess lifts his glasses onto his forehead so he can rub his tired eyes.

“Sylvain you are such an idiot.” A big big massive idiot, who's just had sexual thoughts pertaining to his best friend. He can't even deny it now, the fruits of his feelings still dripping down his hand. Yeah, this is going to be a problem.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've written sex plenty of times but somehow I'd never written a masturbation scene and I was actually pretty nervous despite the scene's small length.
> 
> This is all that's been written so far so stay tuned for the next couple of chapters (I've got them all outlined out, just gotta you know write them). I'd love to hear any opinions or feedback. If this feeds anyone else the way it's fed me writing it, then I'll be happy ;w;


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A tiny warning that things are gonna get real Dimitri depressing starting this chapter and it will last until the end of the next chapter. I promise that things will get better!

It started out as something small. When Sylvain came home the next day, he told him he was really exhausted from work and couldn't work out with him. They had always exercised together even before he was discharged but Dimitri understood and he didn't question it. Instead Dimitri sat quietly on the couch and watched Sylvain play more of that RPG from the other night with promises that he'd exercise while Sylvain made dinner.

The two of them had lost track of time and therefore dinner was really late. Dimitri did as he promised and did his stretches solo with the the assistance of the kitchen timer. He couldn't seem to remember the order they went in, as that was something Sylvain took care of, and he may have missed one or two entirely, but he did the best he could.

Dinner was as delightful as always. Dimitri liked the idea of sitting around their small wooden table and talking about their day. It made him happy how Sylvain always listened despite each topic not being all too interesting. Today he told him about his trip down to the laundry room and the colorful people who also lived in the apartments that he'd bumped into.

The entire time, Sylvain's eyes never strayed far from him. At some point mid conversation he pointed out a bit of food that had gotten stuck to his face on his blind side. Try as he might, Dimitri couldn't get it and eventually Sylvain had to help him out. His fingers touched him only for a moment to swipe it off his cheek but somehow it felt much longer. Sylvain almost seemed to linger in his space. Until he coughed awkwardly and backed back up to his side of the table. The rest of dinner, Sylvain seemed more quiet.

After dinner was done, he practically disappeared. Dimitri noted that the basket of Sylvain's clothes left in front of his door was gone so he probably wanted to fold them before going to bed. Dimitri would fold his later, it wasn't terribly important after all.

Dimitri woke up the next morning at noon. The thick curtains in his room kept it nice and dark no matter the time of day. The only reason he even woke up was because he had to pee. Only after rubbing the crust out of his eye did he see what time it was. Strange, Sylvain didn't wake him up this morning.

Bumbling his way into the kitchen he found a stack of pancakes sitting on the table left forgotten at room temperature. See Sylvain was probably just in a hurry today. He popped the cakes in the microwave and drowned them in syrup. Dimitri noticed that texture-wise they were much better fresh but didn't complain. He was just happy to have something to eat.

Afterwards he scrubbed some of the dishes in the sink, it was the least he could do. Though he didn't feel quite like doing them all, maybe later. If he's being honest with himself, he doesn't even remember how he spent the rest of his day. The last thing he remembers is crashing on the couch and now he's waking up to the blinding light of the living room light above him.

“Hey Dima, you been here all day?”

Dimitri can hear the subtle current of laughter in his voice and responds groggily. “N-no, not exactly.” And he did get up to go to the bathroom a few times so he's not really fibbing.

“Only joking. Did you exercise at all today?”

“Yes of course.” Dimitri lies so quickly, he's not even aware that he did it until he sees the expression of surprise in on Sylvain's freckled face. Why did he lie about that?

“That's good.” He says it with such a mixed smile on his face that fades almost immediately. “I'm sorry, I got tied up in work. I got scheduled for some later nights this week so you might be on your own for dinner.”

“That is... fine. I am capable of taking care of myself after all.”

Sylvain does this little hum as if he's trying to find the words to speak. “Right, dinner?”

Dinner, which is a little earlier that day, was taken over to the living room so it could be eaten while gaming. Dimitri kinda misses the table but he still enjoys Sylvain's company. More of the same game tonight.

As he watches Sylvain from the couch, he chews on his bottom lip. Somehow he's filled with this feeling of emptiness. Sylvain's more quiet tonight and he feels so far away. Dimitri always sits on the couch to watch him but would it be so bad to sit next to him and watch instead?

“Um, Sylvain?”

“Yeah, what's up Dima?” He responds without looking away from the screen but the use of his familiar nickname emboldens him to speak up.

“Do you mind if I sit next to you? It's hard to see the screen.” That's... a bit of a lie if he's being honest and he nervous Sylvain is going to bring that up.

“Sure buddy.”

The confirmation ups his spirits as he crawls over to sit next to Sylvain nearly shoulder to shoulder. Wait, maybe he's sitting too close and the fear forces him to speak up. “I am not in the way am I?”

Sylvain laughs. “What kind of arm movements do you think I'm going to be doing? You're perfectly fine right there.”

Okay good, Dimitri smiles to himself. They stay that way for a the rest of the night. Occasionally one of them shifts as limbs fall asleep and their shoulders bump. Sylvain doesn't seem quite at his best tonight and he apologizes about it but he's much better than Dimitri would be so it's fine.

The two of them say goodnight to each other as they head their separate ways for the night. The basket of clothes near his door glares back at Dimitri. Maybe tomorrow.

Dimitri awakens much in the same way as the previous day. It's some hour of the afternoon.

Investigating the kitchen, all he could find were last night dishes in the sink and leftovers in the fridge. It should have been silly to expect breakfast waiting for him. Just because Sylvain had been doing that recently didn't mean it was his job to do it every morning. Still Dimitri felt a pang of sadness in his stomach, that or he was just hungry which was also very possible.

He microwaved a couple of hotdogs which he munched on throughout the afternoon. They forgot to buy buns so Dimitri used a couple slices of bread. It all tasted the same to him. He constantly found himself checking his phone throughout the day, bored again like every other day. As Sylvain would always say to him, he needed a hobby. He predictably falls asleep on the couch again.

Sylvain is back at some time late and Dimitri groggily remembers the outline of his roommate rousing him from sleep on the couch. Yesterday's lie feels like a slippery slope as he lies again exercising again. He can't see the expression Sylvain is making as he goes back to the kitchen to work on dinner.

The remainder of the night precedes much like the one before it. Sitting on the floor last night made Dimitri realize just how uncomfortable the floor was to sit on for prolonged periods of time. Eventually he convinces Sylvain to game on the couch if they promise that they'd move the couch a little closer to the TV. At first they sat a bit apart but throughout the night they seemed to gravitate closer until Dimitri is tucked right next to Sylvain comfortably leaning on his arm.

It's comfortable and he doesn't even remember closing his eye but he must have because the next thing he remembers is the feeling of falling over which wakes him up with a jerk. Sylvain apologizes for getting off the couch and disturbing his sleep and the two depart once more to their own spaces. Dimitri doesn't even acknowledge the basket near his door.

Dimitri would remember this day as the start of when his days began to blur together. He woke up sometime in the afternoon again to another barren kitchen and raiding the fridge for food. Another day of switching between checking his phone, watching TV, and sleeping. Nothing he did made him feel less empty. His thoughts were very loud today as he thought of all the people out there with jobs contributing to society and of him wasting away here.

The need once again to empty his bladder is of course what wakes him up enough to roll off the couch. It's dark in the apartment. Is Sylvain still at work? After relieving himself does he check the time, 9:13 at night. Surely Sylvain must be home. Did he go to bed early? In which case why didn't he wake Dimitri up at all? Did he really just leave him there sleeping on the couch?

Dimitri notes that Sylvain's door is closed. He usually leaves it open when he leaves and only closes it when he's retired for the night. There's a tight feeling in his stomach as he wanders into the kitchen. A forlorn pizza box is sitting on the table and he opens it to find half of a pizza inside. Dinner, he guesses. He's not sure if he's even feeling up to food but his stomach alerts him to the fact that he really should eat and he manages a couple slices of room temperature pizza at the table before disappearing into his room.

Morning came, or was it afternoon? Dimitri didn't know or care. He saw the basket of his laundry forlorn on the floor next to his door and pushed it into a corner of his messy room instead of dealing with it. There now it wouldn't sit around mocking him every time he went to the bathroom. Since he was already back in his room, he decided to flop back on his bed. He wasn't in the mood to do anything.

Dimitri was in and out of sleep. In his waking moments he checked his phone mindlessly. No messages, he put his phone away again. Was Sylvain avoiding him? These last few days were really weird right? It wasn't just him?

Every night Sylvain felt so far away and as much as he tried to bridge that gap, Dimitri felt that it just caused Sylvain to pull away more. Was it his fault? Did he do something that made Sylvain angry with him?

“You're such a burden.” The voices in his head were loud enough to hear. “You expect everyone to wait on you hand and foot. Prepare your meals, make you exercise. When's the last time you actually got dressed? Can't you do anything yourself?”

Dimitri shut his eyes tight and covered himself in his heavy blankets to drown out the noise but to no avail.

“Of course you can't. You even tried hiding your laundry in the corner because even that is too much for you to handle. Look at this room, what a mess. I can't believe Sylvain has put up with you this long. I'm sure he's been finding excuses not to hang out with you.”

“No, he has work! He is... just busy is all.”

“He didn't even want to see you yesterday.”

Dimitri heart dropped into the pit of his stomach and he tried to think of anything, any rational thing that he could to not acknowledge those words. He couldn't. Maybe Sylvain really didn't want to see him yesterday.

“Sylvain probably feels obligated to take care of you because he pities you. I mean you look awful and you won't do anything yourself. Can't even do dishes while he's away. How is Sylvain supposed to do anything with a sink full of dishes? It must be so exhausting to take care of you. He must be so tired all the time. It's no wonder he doesn't want to see you.”

“That's not true, he's busy! He's just busy! It's not-he's not!” Dimitri gets back on his phone to drown his thoughts. Anything to get him to stop thinking. Suddenly in his scrolling a picture catches his eye. Sylvain was tagged in this picture just last night. It was some bar Dimitri didn't recognize and he was with people he didn't recognize either. He was smiling. Enjoying his time away from Dimitri like he had every right to do. Dimitri and Sylvain did just about everything together and somehow seeing him having fun with other people felt so sour to him. “He was avoiding me....”

It feels like something is stuck in his throat like he almost he can't breathe. His takes in shaky inhale. It's true though, everyone eventually leaves him or stops coming by. Dimitri knew it was only a matter of time before Sylvain finally wised up. The smiling faces at his party so long ago feel fake and sour in his mind.

Dimitri feels overwhelmed and he tosses his phone across the room a little too forcefully causing it to land in some pile of shirts who knows where. This causes a spiderweb of pain to jolt throughout his shoulder and he winces. He realizes he hasn't been taking his medication recently. Maybe he can just sleep off the pain. It feels like his shoulder is pulsing and he rolls over, it's so uncomfortable.

Dimitri has no concept of time anymore. At best his curtains have a soft white glow to them in the daytime but he's sleeping so much he has no idea when the days turn over. How long has he been in bed? It feels like an eternity. The more he sleeps the worse he feels. Due in part to the nightmares that have been plaguing him now when he actually does sleep. He hasn't had them since the accident for happened and he's horrified to know that they're back again. Now not even sleep is there for him. The pain is a thrum of noise added to everything else wrong with him and it is bringing him near to tears.

He thinks he can hear the distant sounds of doors slamming and of feet but knows by now how foolish it is to put faith in his senses. Delirium has been his only friend for so long, he can't imagine anyone is coming for him.

Suddenly though something happens that causes him to open his eye slightly. His door is blown wide open and a soft light fills the room along with an outline of a person. Their voice is heaving and raspy as it yells into the darkness of the room. “Dimitri?!!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was the single hardest thing for me to write for a couple of reasons. Reason one being, I was fighting my inner self who couldn't stand writing them getting further and further away from each other. I just wanted to two of them to stop doing this right now and smooch. Reason two is that this being a Dimitri chapter, I naturally found myself writing his depression the way I go through mine and it's been such a long time (which I'm glad for) since I've ever felt that low that I almost felt like I had to take extra time coaxing those feelings of out to put me in the right mindset to write. I had to make myself write a little bit every day to finally make this chapter a reality.
> 
> I hope in the end those feelings came through and the progression felt natural. That was my end goal.
> 
> I'll be posting the next few chapters starting tonight excluding the final chapter (which I'm still writing)


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter starts with the infamous well from Sylvain's childhood so there's a minor warning for Miklan's abuse.

Sylvain awakens in a cold sweat. His body jolted and shaking from a vivid nightmare. How long has it been since he's been visited by that particular nightmare? A chill washes over him upon recalling it.

He was back to when he was 7 at the bottom of the well on the family estate. The water was frigid and soaked him to the bone. Miklan had made him go to down there. Said that he had dropped a signet ring belong to their father and how Sylvain being so young and small could easily go down in the bucket and get that for him. Sylvain knew even from a young age the consequences of defying Miklan and therefore felt forced to comply for his own safety.

After reaching the bottom of the well he got out and ran his hands along the bottom of the feeling for anything he could. The water came up to his knees and it was cold simply due to the late fall weather. Where they lived it was always rather cold this time of year. He was sure Miklan picked this time specifically for that reason.

Sylvain heard the sound of the bucket being raised up and his body went into a panic. Miklan only laughed at his feeble attempts to grab for the bucket as it went above his head and away from his grasp. He began to realize he'd been lied to and started screaming for help with everything he had. His elder brother sneered at him and told him to scream all he wanted, nobody was going to look for him anyway before walking away.

Sylvain continued to scream and scream until his throat grew sore and his lungs ached. He didn't know how long he'd been down there but could see it was starting to get dark. The night would bring with it even colder temperatures and people would eventually go to sleep. Would they really forget about him down here in the cold? Big salty tears streaked down his face as he wailed in terror. He didn't want to die down here in this well alone and forgotten. His voice gurgled and cracked now as he screamed with all his might.

Eventually it was one of the maids of the household who heard him. She returned with help to rescue him from his underground prison. The ordeal had left him shaken up for days and even years afterwards he refused to go near that well. Miklan, in Sylvain's eyes, got off with a slap on the wrist. Hardly anything changed. Eventually he left home and Sylvain never saw him again. For that at least, he was thankful.

Sylvain snapped back to reality and shook the ghosts from his mind. He shouldn't, no couldn't, dwell on this. He had to go to work. After taking a searing hot shower, he was out the door. All thoughts from his mind purged as he started his day.

Work was just a short drive away. Sylvain worked as a teller for one of the many banks in their large college town. With his dashing good looks, suave voice to match, and a pretty good knack for numbers it was little wonder how he had snagged a job as good as this. The pay was good and the work conditions usually acceptable. When he started off he use to run into quite a few of his angry 'date for a week then dump' girlfriends. It made work a little awkward but as Sylvain drifted away from the habit the instances all but stopped.

Lunch break came around and he clocked out. As he was heading out of the lobby he ran into Dedue who greeting him with the same contemplative scowl he always had. Poor Dedue seemed to be cursed with what one would call an intimidating aura but once you got to know him you'd feel silly for ever assuming anything about him. He was a wonderful friend who always reached out to his friends and also happened to make the best stuffed peppers.

Now Dedue was more Dimitri or Mercedes's friend than his, but everyone in their friend group was close enough that a meeting with them wasn't odd in of itself. Annette had dragged him out for about a dozen luncheons. Still something felt a little different this time.

“Are you off on lunch? I'm wondering if we can talk for a bit.”

Sylvain responded without missing a beat. “Yeah, sure. I know this diner right around the block that has amazing variety and the service is fantastic!” What could Dedue possibly want to talk about with him?

Neither of them had said a word between the walk there and ordering but as Sylvain took a sip of his coke Dedue spoke up. “How's Dimitri been doing?”

“Dimitri? Fine I think.”

“You think? He's your roommate. Listen he hasn't been answering my text messages and I'm just getting a little worried about him. You know how he can get sometimes.”

“He's just tired is all. Recovery takes a lot out of a person.” However Dedue's words start to turn the gears in his mind and he starts to realize that he actually hasn't seen Dimitri all that recently. Internally he's turning over the last week. He was trying to give Dimitri his space but also and most importantly every time he hung out with him his chest got all tight, his heart started to beat irrationally, and it made him want to do something stupid.

It was all the exercise's fault that this started. He figured if he didn't exercise with Dimitri, he wouldn't be as tempting but, ugh, it was other things too. Like when Sylvain woke Dimitri up every morning, how the sun would glisten off of his bright blonde hair and the way his one eye opened slowly blinking away sleep through long elegant lashes. One morning he almost kissed him. Dimitri made these really cute noises in the morning, when he was fighting off getting up, and Sylvain could feel his body absolutely panicking.

Every time he'd think he had put enough barriers in place to stop noticing one thing, Dimitri would surprise him with something else and the flutter in his heart would start up again. Being there for Dimitri was becoming incredibly difficult for him. The night when they sat together on the couch to play games Dimitri fell asleep on his shoulder. Sylvain sat there for hours like that, just stopped playing to listen to the sound of his roommate breathing. The longer they sat the more Sylvain's head spun and he realized he just couldn't do this anymore, it was all too much.

The next night after work some of his colleagues asked if he wanted to grab a drink with them and he jumped at the chance. They went to some pub place to get pizza and beer and before he knew it, it had become quite late. When he got home Dimitri was asleep on the couch and he felt it better to leave him there.

After that it became easy to accept invitations that he wouldn't normally to stay out late drinking. It had been a while since he drank as much as he had the past couple days. Maybe that would attribute the nightmare that had reared its ugly head at him last night. In truth he's now starting to worry that Dimitri isn't fine. Of course, Dedue could not know this. Dedue could definitely not know this. He had to pretend like everything was fine.

“I'll talk to him tonight. Would that put your mind at ease?”

“It would, thank you. It's just not like him to not answer his texts. What about you? Are you fine Sylvain?”

The question causes him to stir but not break character. “Could probably do with a little more sleep but I'm doing well.”

“Sleep is important in maintaining your health Sylvain. You'd do well to keep that in mind.”

“Thanks for the concern.” He says with one of his patented fake Sylvain smiles.

The day goes by agonizingly slow. Sylvain is constantly checking the time and his phone in between customers. Dimitri was really bad after the accident. What if he regresses back to that or worse? Sylvain can't stop thinking that this really is all his fault. He's such a shit lord! Dimitri really needed him and he pulled away for what, because he was falling in love with him? Because the thought of facing his feelings scared him shitless?

Sure maybe he is scared. He's never felt this way about anyone before. Sure he's had like dozens of girlfriends but they were a hobby more than anything else. Something to have fun with when he started college. About a year ago he stopped seeing girls altogether. He found himself becoming bored with the endless cycle is flirting and dumping that once held his attention. Plus he was spending a lot more of his time with Dimitri and girlfriends just didn't factor in anymore. Though, now that he's thinking about it, even before that he prioritized hanging out with Dimitri over hanging out with a particular girlfriend. Oh that just made some girls furious.

Quitting time arrives and Sylvain is gone before his coworkers can even get a word in about after work festivities. The drive back home of course is only a 10 minute or so drive but it feels exponentially longer as he hits every red light on the way. “Please be alright, please be okay.” Sylvain mutters his worries under his breath as his fingers impatiently tap the steering wheel.

He parks crooked in his apartment parking space but he's not even thinking about it as he dashes out of his car and straight into the building. He taps the elevator button but its speed isn't up to his liking and he rushes up the stairs instead. They live on the third floor so it's not terrible but even in his good shape he's wheezing for air as he reaches their floor.

Fumbling for keys he finally gets the door open and slams it behind in in his haste. The apartment is dark. There's not even the light of the television like most days. He has to turn on the lights so he's not bumping into things. Dimitri isn't on the couch. He gets to Dimitri's closed door and flings it open with haste. “Dimitri?!!” Yelling in between gasps for air, he realizes he must sound awful.

The room is completely dark like the apartment but a bundle on the bed groans somewhat in response and his heart aches at the sight of it. His legs feel shaky as he walks towards the bed. “Dimitri?”

“Go away.” The muffled growl of a voice that responds to him sounds pained and very not Dimitri-like.

Sylvain's eyes are still not accustomed to the darkness of the room so he can't clearly see him just yet but he knows, he absolutely knows something is wrong. He calls to him again as he finally reaches the side of the bed. “Dimitri?”

“Go away.” His voice is still muffled by the covers but Sylvain feels that he's gotten louder.

“I won't.” Sylvain lays a hand on the crumpled ball on the bed. “Not until I-.” He feels the mass shift and another groan reaches his ears. He's sure that seeing the state that Dimitri is in will surely break his heart and maybe he's pushing his boundaries now but he needs to know and he needs to apologize.

He rips the covers off to find Dimitri laying on his side in the fetal position clenching tightly at his forearms, fingers practically digging into his arms. The one eye he has left barely opens to acknowledge him as he kneels on the floor to get a better look at what Dimitri's become. Sylvain notices his face has a certain redness to it and the sight of that alone makes him want to cry. He's done this to Dimitri.

His voice is a but a small croak. “Please, go away Sylvain.”

“Dimitri I...” He has to say it. “I understand if you're upset with me, I keep making these stupid decisions. I hate to see you like this but more than that I hate myself for letting things get this bad. Everything's just gotten so much worse because I was too scared to confront you-to confront myself about these feelings I've been desperately trying to push down. I'm so so sorry Dimitri. I can't possibly express how sorry I am.” Emotion wells up in his voice as it shakes.

However, this does seem to catch Dimitri's attention as he looks up at him with his good eye in disbelief. “Sylvain...?”

“So no, I won't go away. I-” His voice catches in his throat. “The thought of you spiraling back into depression because of me, it kills me. I should know best of all the pain of being left alone with your fears and yet I pulled away from you. I ran when you needed me most and that I...I don't want this.” He reaches up with one of his hands to cover his face as he feels his emotions about to burst and it takes a minute before he's able to talk again.

He removes the hand from his face and focuses all of his attention on Dimitri. “You look much better when you're smiling you know.” His voice softens as he fondly recalls memories of the past. “Your laugh is one of the most beautiful things I've ever heard and I cherish it that I can't help but stare.” Sylvain lays a hand on Dimitri's damp cheek and runs his thumb along his cheekbone. “It's really embarrassing actually. You think I'd be better than this”

Dimitri has shifted slightly and is now gazing intently back at Sylvain with a surprised look on his face but he says nothing.

“Dima...” He whispers that all to familiar nickname getting closer. “Everything could have been avoided if I just talked to you about this earlier. If I wasn't so scared to put this feeling into words. Putting it into words changes things and I was terrified of losing you, of changing what we had over a feeling. But... the feeling is so strong now that if I push it away, I push you away. I understand that now.”

Sylvain's eyes are closed as he brings his forehead down to touch Dimitri's. “All of this would have been so easy if I realized earlier just how in love with you I was.” Sylvain can't help himself now as he brings himself to do that which he kept himself from for so long and brings their lips together. They're chapped, warm, and a little bit salty and he feels them twitch underneath his. Sylvain doesn't think he's had a kiss so chaste and yet so impactful and he wants so much more but he releases his hold as quickly as he took it.

Dimitri's face is much redder than before as he babbles a response. “I-I thought you were mad at me Sylvain. I was so worried I had made you angry.” Like a dam long held back, tears begin to streak anew from his good eye and it causes Sylvain to panic.

“I-I'm so sorry Dimitri! I didn't mean to- that is no, I could never be angry at you.”

Dimitri sits up a bit with another laborious groan and before Sylvain can say anything Dimitri's body comes crashing into his. He slots his head into the crook of Sylvain's neck and mumbles. “Can you... hold me just for a bit? Is that too much to ask?”

Sylvain puts his arms around him and holds him tightly. “Absolutely, buddy.” He feels the tears against his neck as Dimitri huffs a fraction of a sob. They stay that way for a while as Dimitri cries, Sylvain thinks, for the first time in a long long time.

Afterwards it's Dimitri who speaks up first. They are still slotted together and his words feel hot upon Sylvain's neck. “Sylvain, I think you might not be the only one with feelings you could not name. I have noticed a deep emptiness within me whenever I would see you pull away. At first I wasn't sure what it was but I came to realize when we were apart just how much I missed you. I tried bridging that gap when I could and for that moment, it did make me happy again. Your attention upon me, I found it all very nice.”

Sylvain really wishes he could see Dimitri's expression right now but he doesn't move. “Yeah? Why don't we talk about that some more. If you'd like.”

“Yes, I would like that.” He stirs and Sylvain feels his body tense with a murmur.

Only now does Sylvain think to ask and he feels like an idiot all over again. “How long have you been in pain?”

“I don't know how long I have been in bed, but my shoulder has been hurting bad enough that the pain often keeps me awake.”

“Yeah, that's a problem Dima. Hold on, I'm getting your pain killers. I'll be right back.” He lets go of Dimitri and leaves him in his bed as he gets up and walks back into the kitchen.

Dimitri's medication is easy to find. He leaves it on the table so Dimitri doesn't have to reach up to grab it. He also fills him up a glass of water, something nice from the fridge and not the tap. Lastly, he stops on the way back to grab something from his bedroom.

Dimitri is sitting up propped against the wall.

“Good you're sitting up. Here.” He hands him the glass of water first waiting until he has both hands around the glass and he's able to transfer it to just one hand before handing him his pills. Sylvain pushes the blankets around Dimitri away as he settles on the bed next to him and waits for him to finish.

Dimitri chugs the entire glass with a huff. “I did not realize how thirsty I was.”

“Do you want me to get more?”

“No, I think I am fine.” Dimitri looks at the now empty glass in his hands and to his dresser in a not so subtle way that causes Sylvain to chuckle softly.

“Here, let me.” He stands up and takes the glass from him to set upon the dresser. “Dima?”

“Yes, Sylvain?” Even in the dimly lit room Sylvain can make out Dimitri looking up at him with his good eye. His hair is absolutely disheveled and he's wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt that he probably hasn't changed all week and yet, there still something about him Sylvain finds very charming. He seems to have Dimitri's full attention and the notion makes his heart flutter.

He clears his throat. “I sat in on all of your therapy sessions when you were recovering. I know it was more than I ever needed to do, but I always hoped doing so how make me helpful to you somehow.”

There is a pause in his words and Dimitri fills in the space. “I remember that. It was nice having someone else there.”

“And I'm not going to say I'm like the best person qualified. I mean I'm not a licensed professional but I did get to watch a licensed professional and I'm sure I can remember what they did during those sessions. So, uh, would you like you know, care for a massage or something?”

Dimitri's single eye widens slightly as he looks back at him. “I-” He pauses slightly and Sylvain wonders if he's asked too much. “I would not say no.” This time Dimitri averts his gaze. It's not bright enough to see if he's blushing but Sylvain would like to think he is.

“Here, let me help you take off your shirt for you. I'm just going to get around your shoulders and back.” He helps Dimitri thread his arms carefully out of his shirt and pulls it up over head head. Taunt muscle greets him, it makes him a little breathless as Sylvain realizes he will never get tired to seeing Dimitri's physique. “Now let's see here. In the massage session they had you laying flat on your stomach, so let's do that.”

“Right.” Dimitri is careful as he lays down and moves his head sideways so that his blind side is facing the pillow.

“Comfortable?”

“I think so.”

Sylvain makes humming sort of noise as he goes for the bottle of massage oil he brought from his room. The room is flooded with a pleasant earth aroma of almond, rosemary, and some other greenery Sylvain can't remember as he rubs it between his hands for a little while to warm it up. His hands eventually settle on the shoulder closest to him. He recalls the particular hand placements the masseuse used during therapy and presses into those sections of muscle, firm but gentle. It causes a bit of a muffled groan to escape Dimitri's lips and Sylvain halts immediately. “Was that a good noise or a bad one? Give me some feedback here Dima.”

“A good one I think. I am probably not the best person to ask about his but I trust you to not break my back.” He says with a slight smile on his face.

“Thanks for the vote of confidence. I appreciate that.” Using a combination of his palms and the tips of his fingers he continues to knead at the muscle underneath as best as he can. “You know Ingrid says I give really good massages. She use to overexert herself when she took that martial arts class way back during high school.”

“How did you ever convince Ingrid to even let you give her a massage. She must have hurt herself pretty badly to ask you.”

“Ouch, have you been hanging around Felix? I guess she had heard it from some girls at school. It was admittedly one of my many wooing lines. Girls love a man who can give a massage you know.”

“But were you actually good at it?”

“Well, I had never tried but I thought how bad could it be? It's just rubbing someone's back. Dima, most of the girls I use to date were easy to impress. I didn't have to try very hard. Of course when Ingrid confronted me about it I was worried she'd kick my ass if I did a terrible job so I actually had to try. Turns out I was pretty good at it. At least to the point where Ingrid wasn't going to throttle me.”

Dimitri openly laughs at this. “That is good to know. You know now that you've told me this, you may be responsible for more massages starting today.”

Sylvain feels his heart jump a little hearing something so bold come out of Dimitri and he tries to laugh it off. “Who wold I be to turn down a request like that?”

The room gets quiet again as Sylvain shifts the placement of his hands to focus on another area of his shoulder and Sylvain can hear the little huffs the other makes at the pressure. Dimitri is the one to eventually break the silence. “So, how long have you been, I mean you know...felt this way?”

Even after the kiss, Sylvain can tell Dimitri is still dancing around his words about everything. Maybe it's still too new to him. “Honestly, I don't know if I can place it but I think if I'm being honest with myself, for a while now. The more I think about it, the more I realize how much in denial I was for such a long time. You were always...” He pauses his motions completely for a few seconds picking his words carefully. “You were always so special to me. You remember when all three of us used to play as kids?”

“Felix always suggested we hung out at his house and Rodrigue would never decline.”

Sylvain nodded fondly. “He never wanted to be too far from Glenn. You know, it's really stupid but I was always really jealous of Felix because of that. There was a time when we were kids that I hated that about him. I used to ask myself why he had a household with a loving father and a brother who cared for him and I was stuck with... well what I had. I think there might have been some part of me that clung to you because of that. You didn't have any siblings and my young self was so fixated on protecting you, like I thought an older brother would. It grew into a need to always be there for you and over time, being with you felt so natural. I found so many things about you that fascinated and amused me. As I got older those feelings changed. I still wanted to protect you but there was a fear now that I felt whenever I thought of life without you.”

“The accident...” Dimitri mutters to himself but it's loud enough that Sylvain can hear.

“I was terrified of losing you after the accident and I felt this need to stay by your side as much as possible. But like Icarus I get the feeling that I flew too close to the sun. Seeing you at your most vulnerable I tried to believe that those feelings, that want to protect you, rose from that childlike need. I told myself that what I was doing was because I was your best friend and that's what friends do but I think a part of me knew the truth.”

“Is that-is that why you avoided from me?”

“Yes. I didn't want these feeling to drag you down, but looking back I ran so far in the opposite direction that I did exactly that.” Sylvain laughs half-heartedly smoothing his hands along the junction near the base of Dimitri's neck. “I'm a real idiot. I don't know why you put up with me all the time.”

Dimitri sighs at the touch. “Sylvain, you are my most trusted companion. I meant every word that I said that night I said that. You help me all the time when you never have to. I never understood why for so long. You had everything that I did not: girls, a social life, good grades, a job, you had your life together. It was something I felt I could never obtain. Compared to you, I felt like I was barely keeping afloat. I was the one who did not understand why you preferred to hang out with me.”

“None of those things ever mattered to me as much as you did though. I was willing to drop everything for you. I'm still willing to drop everything.”

“Please do not drop your job Sylvain, how would we ever pay for this apartment?” Dimitri chuckles and Sylvain can see that smile he loves so much.

“Right, I will most definitely not do that then.”

Dimitri's next words are rather quiet. “But, you meant what you said right?”

“About dropping everything?”

“About how in love with me you are.” Dimitri's face darkens as he says his and even his face turns a little more into his pillow. Sylvain finds this shy behavior very cute and has to avert his eyes.

“Of course, Dima.” Even his face feels a little warmer at the conversation shift.

“Good.” Dimitri does not say more but his shy smile says the rest and at that moment it means everything to Sylvain.

Sylvain goes back to humming softly as he compresses the different muscles on Dimitri's back, enjoying the sight of Dimitri at peace beneath him. They continue like this for a while and as he finally finishes he wonders if the other has fallen asleep. “Dima, you awake still?”

Dimitri flutters his lashes sleepily and mumbles. “Yes.” Again, Sylvain feels his heart beat in his chest at the sight.

“Tomorrow is my day off. I think we should make a day of it. I'll help you clean up the house and later that night we could go out to eat. Like a date.”

“Y-yeah?” Sylvain can tell those words seemed to perk him up more.

“Would that be alright with you?” He places a hand on Dimitri's head feeling his hair with his fingers.

“I do not think I could come up with anything that would make me happier.”

“Of course, you're not leaving this house until you've bathed. Dima, I love you but when is the last time you showered?” Sylvain's tone turns teasing and it causes Dimitri to go red in embarrassment.

“Sylvain!” That scolding tone of Dimitri's is so familiar and so right Sylvain can't help but grin wide and laugh. He continues to laugh until he nearly cries. Eventually he does stop and Dimitri takes the opportunity to speak up. “Sylvain?”

“What's up?”

“Could you, sleep here next to me tonight?”

“Sure buddy but only if you promise me one thing.” Sylvain says this with a bit of a wink and Dimitri look at him suspiciously.

“What is it?”

“Please promise me you won't ever tell Felix that I made you cry. He'll quite literally kill me.” Sylvain's expression seems to change in the blink of an eye to match his plea.

This time it's Dimitri's turn to start laughing. “I will.”

Sylvain leaves only to change his clothes into his pajama pants and take out his contacts. When he gets back, he settles right next to Dimitri on his bed. Dimitri is still on his stomach but he shifts slightly to lay more on his side and the two are now face to face. “Seeing you like this-” He brings his hand up to the side of Dimitri's face and caresses his cheek. “-I'm finding it really hard to not just kiss you right here.”

Dimitri sounds sleepy as he responds back. “Then kiss me.”

So Sylvain does. He leans in and their lips slot together, still warm, still chapped, but much less salty. When they part Dimitri huffs and leans into Sylvain's chest to hide his face. Sylvain's arms wrap around him and he rubs small circles into his back.

It's no surprise Dimitri falls asleep first. Sylvain continues to listen to him softly breathing in and out and bask in the presence of the other laying beside him. He feels truly at ease and once sleep finally does find him he sleeps good for the first time in a long while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we've reached it!! The make-up, the understanding, the smooch!!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted more cute domestic stuff now that they're being honest with their feelings so that's exactly what I wrote!

It's been a week since Sylvain came crashing into Dimitri's room and the two worked things out. Dimitri had to admit the days that followed were some of the best he's had. They were even better than the ones following the party.

Sylvain was always more of an early riser than Dimitri was, but the morning after, Dimitri awoke to the rare sight of the other still sleeping beside him. The soft glow of the curtains illuminating the room just enough to see all of the freckles dotting his face and Dimitri practically held his breath as he watched him, worried that he would wake him.

When Sylvain finally did stir, he opened his eyes slowly, smiled, and kissed Dimitri like it was the most natural thing in the world. His heart stirred and he felt the heat rising to his cheeks.

Sylvain's voice is a low rumble. “Good morning Dima.”

“Good morning Sylvain.” Dimitri's response was much more mechanical due mostly to the suddenness of it all. He's sure he'll have to get use to mornings like this from now on.

They spent their day leisurely doing what they had planned to do: breakfast, kisses, laundry, cleaning, Sylvain locking Dimitri in their bathroom until he showered, more kisses, ect. Sylvain even made sure the two of them did a small bout of exercising again. Now that their feelings were more out in the open, Sylvain didn't hide the fact that he was staring at times. When Dimitri caught him, he'd just give this cheeky little smile back and wink and it flustered him.

Getting to spend the whole day with Sylvain was such a refreshing change of pace. Dimitri hadn't gotten farther than the apartment laundry room since his therapy sessions so the sun was brighter than he remembered but Sylvain was next to him with him arm if he needed it. Their date was leagues better than even their best dinner at home. Dimitri couldn't remember a time he smiled so much. Afterwards Sylvain stopped by a game store. Dimitri stood outside and waited, but it wasn't even that long before Sylvain came back out and was thrusting a rectangular box into his hands.

“Here, this is for you.” His smile is wide and bright. “I know you're not much for video games but I think you'd like this one, it's very casual. I think it would help you pass the time when I'm at work.”

Sylvain was right. It was a game quite different from the ones Sylvain played. He could take his time playing it and there weren't any consequences. Everyone in his virtual neighborhood was always happy to see him and eager to talk to him and there was so much to do. Dimitri found that time went much faster when he wasn't checking his phone every 10 minutes.

Every night the two of them would talk softly to each other in bed until one of them fell asleep. This was followed by every morning Dimitri would wake up to Sylvain, already dressed for work, gently kissing his face until he finally got out of bed. It was more than Dimitri could have ever hoped for. Sylvain was back to making breakfast in the morning and he refused to leave the house without a goodbye kiss (not always on the lips but sometimes).

Sylvain helped Dimitri make a schedule for things to get done around the house every week. If something didn't get done before Sylvain came back from work, the task could be done together before anything else so it never became a thing Dimitri stressed over.

At night when Sylvain comes home he watches Sylvain bake some new cheese and pastry dish, eyes wide in amazement. Because Dimitri has been playing his new game, he's not as burnt out on TV and the two of them will sometimes find themselves a tangle of limbs on their too small couch. Dimitri could describe the days that followed as familiar but closer. Nothing had changed too much except their proximity to each other and sheer number of kisses he was peppered with daily. Not that it was a bad thing exactly.

Speaking of proximity, the two of them had been sleeping together every night since. Both Dimitri and Sylvain agreed that they seemed to sleep better with the other next to them than they had alone. The addition of another person soothed the occasional nightmares Dimitri would get considerably so it was hard to turn Sylvain away when he just never went back to his room at night. The two of them had at some point joked about combining their rooms but what would they even do with the extra room?

This night, after dinner, Dimitri was on the couch leaned up against Sylvain who was on his laptop. It approaching the time that Dimitri's conformer from his surgery could be removed. After that Dimitri could replace that with a more natural looking prosthetic eye. The entire ordeal stressed him out thinking about it so Sylvain told him he'd help him. To ease his nerves they were browsing looks and talking about it.

“If you're concerned about cleaning it, I can help you. I take out my contacts every day after all so I've got plenty of experience.”

“But Sylvain what if it falls out and you are not around to help me? I do not think I can master such a task when I am not suppose to remove it often. It is so small, what if I lose it?”

“Dima, you worry too much. It's going to be fine. If anything happens, you call me and we will solve it together. I promise.” He puts a comforting arm around Dimitri's shoulders and squeezes him tightly and it does help. “Besides since your uncle is still paying for everything related to the accident you're bound to get a really professional prosthetic.”

“I guess you are right Sylvain.” Dimitri shifts his position slightly so he can lay his head on the other's shoulder with a labored breath as if conceding defeat on the subject. He can feel Sylvain go still for a moment before moving his hand from his shoulder up to his blond hair. The feeling of Sylvain's fingers running through and playing with his hair is soothing and he moves into the touch slightly.

Despite sleeping next to each other every night, nothing more physical has happened between them yet. The gentle caresses and kisses have been more than Dimitri thinks he could ever deserve but neither of them has really talked more about their relationship, about how far either of it want to see it go. Sometimes he sees a spark of something in Sylvain's eyes like he's still holding something back.

He knows Sylvain has been in a lot of relationships before with girls in the past. Dimitri had never asked Sylvain about any of his previous relationships out of respect for his privacy so all he has are the rumors he's heard on campus. On the other hand, Dimitri has exactly zero experience with any of this. This is all very new to him and he's not sure what's expected of him. It's not exactly like he's worried Sylvain would laugh or make fun of him. Sylvain has been his best friend since forever, he knows.

Dimitri suddenly remembers something and blurts it out, ending the silence. “Oh Sylvain, did you see that Mercedes and Dedue are dating now?”

“Are they? Good for them.” Sylvain had this gentle lovely smile, a real smile, on his face that Dimitri found very charming.

“Dedue had been texting me about it yesterday that he was thinking of asking her out. Apparently the florist company he works for recently went into a partnership with the hospital Mercedes works at so they had been seeing each other a lot more now. He told me how nervous he was about it and I told him to go for it.” If Dedue could find even a fraction of happiness with Mercedes that Dimitri felt being with Sylvain than it was worth asking.

“He'll make her happy. They'll certainly be the couple with the best culinary skills. Seems like everyone around is finally starting to pair off.”

Now that he thinks about it, that's true. Felix and Annette were the first when they started dating at the end of their second year of college. Ashe had starting seeing this guy at the gym about six months ago but it had been really hard to get any information out of him on the ID of this mystery guy. Ingrid, well that was complicated. Way back in high school she had loudly proclaimed how ridiculous she thought dating was and that they were never going to catch her on the arm of some boy. Dimitri knows she would never admit it, but her sudden obsession with the school's drama performances after Sylvain introduced her to his friend Dorothea from the drama club could not have been a coincidence.

“I guess it was only natural for the two of us to get together.” Sylvain laughs and it's bright.

Maybe it's that smile and the fluttering it sets in his chest that emboldens him to speak more about them. “Where is it that you see the two of us? In the future that is. I want to know where we stand.”

Sylvain moves slightly and upon realizing he can't get a good view of Dimitri, closes his laptop, and moves it onto the floor. The action causes Dimitri to sit upright and look Sylvain straight on. He looks really serious.

Sylvain reaches for Dimitri's hands to hold them, keeping his gaze on their hands. “I meant everything I told you that night. I-” Now he brings his face up to meet Dimitri's. “I love you Dimitri, like I've never loved someone before and that's the honest truth. But I won't push you any farther than you're comfortable with. I know that- well that this is all new to you. I know that I can be kind of a lot and I don't want to overstep.”

“No, I mean, I honestly do not mind. The kisses, the touches, I do not mind them at all Sylvain. I enjoy knowing how much you care for me. It makes me feel... I do not know, good? If that makes sense. I do not think you could do anything I would disagree with.” Dimitri can feel his face grow warm after speaking these words.

“Dima, you make sure you understand what you're saying.” Sylvain's voice is suddenly low and rather sultry, if Dimitri's being honest, and it catches him further off guard causing his face to grow further flushed. “Haha, just look at you now.” Sylvain's voice returns back to his usual upbeat tone as he brings up a hand to rub one of Dimitri's cheeks with his thumb. “You look like a blushing maiden.”

“Have you really- you know, thought of me in such a way?”

Sylvain smiles a coy and mischievous smile as he responds back. “And what kind of way would that be?”

“You know... intimately?” Dimitri's body almost slinks down in embarrassment and he can feel the tips of his ears burn.

“Well, you know I'd be lying if I told you no.”

“How... often?” Dimitri's words feel measured out like he's testing the waters of this conversation.

“Mmm a few times here and there.” The response he gets back feels so smooth coming out of Sylvain's mouth, like it's the easiest thing he could say.

Dimitri can feel his heart rapidly beating in his chest but all he manages to say are a soft stilted, “Oh... yeah?”

This causes Sylvain to start laughing. Dimitri pouts back not realizing what is so funny about his response. As Sylvain stops Dimitri can feel the press of the other's forehead on his and a whisper. “Hey don't be like that. I find the way you respond to things rather adorable and I can't help myself sometimes. Would you like to know what I think? The fantasies about you that won't leave me head?”

The mere mention of Sylvain's fantasies is enough to reignite the flames of bashfulness in his face but he steels himself and does a small nod in response. He feels he has to hear this if they're ever going to move forward with their relationship. And truth be hold, he's genuinely curious.

Sylvain chuckles, a low and breathy thing. He talks about a lot of things from their positioning switching at a moment's notice to the way he wants to kiss every part of Dimitri and make him gasp until his lungs give out. Or the way he wants Dimitri to throw him down roughly and have his way with him until he cannot remember anything other than Dimitri's name. Honestly Sylvain has a lot of ideas and it's well, really a lot.

Dimitri doesn't think he's ever heard anyone want him quite like that. His mind tries fruitlessly to process everything Sylvain is saying, but it keeps burning out whenever Sylvain whispers something new to him. To hear Sylvain talk so positively about his body and how he wants to show him all the love that's been building inside of him, Dimitri's heart almost can't take it.

Sylvain stops when he notices Dimitri is now as red as a tomato and looking like a deer in the headlights. “Dima, I don't want you to think that just because I have these feelings and fantasies we have to do everything now. We don't have to do anything at all if you don't want to. I just want you to know just how passionately I feel about you. I've bottled all of this up for such a long time that honestly it's a relief to finally get this off of my chest. I want to go at your pace. That's what's important to me, that we love each other at a pace we both can agree on, yeah?”

“Yes, right! I am happy that you have shared these things with me Sylvain. I will just have to think upon them for now though, you understand?”

“That I do.” Sylvain brings both hands up to cup Dimitri's flushed face and rubs his cheekbones with his thumbs and it does soothe him. “Take as much time as you need. You know where to find me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was going to go into detail with Sylvain's fantasies, but it just wasn't working out. I guess you'll just have to look forward to it next chapter (because there will absolutely be smut) ;)
> 
> Next chapter is indeed the last chapter, and if you've held on this long, I'm hoping you find the payoff worth it!
> 
> I want to stress just how happy it makes me to know people read and enjoy what I write! Dimivain and its fans deserve good things :>


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it! The chapter with all the smut in it!  
> This chapter can probably be read by itself all things considered

Today is Sylvain's day off, neither him or Dimitri have any definitive plans today so Sylvain is planted on the couch with a book. He usually only gets time to read if Dimitri retires early (which is almost never) or during his lunch break at work, so this small moment in time is a welcome reprieve. It's a new fantasy romance title from a relatively small author. Sylvain's always been a fan of her works. So even if he doesn't have the time to read them right away, he always makes sure to pick up the new one to support her.

He adjusts his glasses before leafing to the next page. The apartment is quiet save for the sound of Dimitri in the shower and the hum of the air conditioning unit and life is good. He used to always read these books with a twinge of sadness. They felt so idealistic, the right person at the right time could shake everything between the characters whether good or bad. Still, the leads always seemed to find each other a midst the chaos and the endings were always happy. He used to ask himself if such a fairy tale ending was even possible in real life. To say he was hopeful might be a stretch but it was always in the back of his mind.

Being official with Dimitri made him realize it was maybe a bit of both. There might be some fairy tale magic ending out there but it was something he'd have to work towards, and he was fine with that. Of course, it took the biggest stumbling of his life to realize that. Every day afterwards though, has strengthened that conviction, of that, he's more sure than ever.

Sylvain thinks it's probably a combination of many things. There are nearly a million innocent things Sylvain finds so adorable about Dimitri every day, that cause his stomach to stir into butterflies. After all this time, he can finally let those butterflies out. He's also found that acting on these feelings is bringing out bolder things in Dimitri too which is both exciting and concerning. Mostly exciting, he tells himself. Sometimes he finds himself lost in his head with fantasies and possibilities to stay steps ahead. He feels sure enough that he could get things right, but his anxiety never lets him keep those for very long.

“Sylvain.” The sound of Dimitri's voice so soft and polite makes Sylvain realize that he's doing it again.

“Yes?” He puts his index finger in his book and closes it lightly to look up at him. As soon as he sees him though he has to choke back a gulp. Dimitri fresh out of the shower is truly a sight. His hair is still damp and in true Dimitri fashion is just everywhere. He's wearing the same sweatpants he woke up in (because of course he is) but lacking the shirt. A couple beads of water run down his chest and Sylvain just has to redirect his gaze because he's positive that he's staring now.

“Sylvain... can I possibly bother you for a shoulder massage?”

Sylvain's mind, which immediately shifts into the worst possible scenario, causes him to jump into action. “You're not having back pain are you?!” Oh no, too much emotion.

Dimitri stares back at him likely being taken by surprise. “No, no, Sylvain, everything is fine. I am alright.” His voice takes this quiet little turn as he says with a blush, “I... I would just like one is all.”

“Oh...” Sylvain nods in response, attempting to put his mess of a self back together again. “Alright.” He realizes his panic caused him to drop his book on the floor. Ah drat, he'll just have to find his spot later then. “I have to grab some things real quick. You get all situated on the floor in front of the couch.”

Dimitri says nothing as Sylvain speed walks into their bedroom and emerges with a hair tie and his massage oil. He situates himself on the couch behind Dimitri as he mentally readies himself. Sylvain is careful with Dimitri's hair as he gathers it all together to tie up and out of the way. As he uncaps the bottle of oil and applies it to his hands, the soft scent of almond rosemary quickly fills their space.

He can hear Dimitri make a pleasant hum and chuckles quietly. “I haven't even started.”

After warming the oil between his hands, he cups them and gently places them on Dimitri's broad shoulders. He can feel the muscles and collarbone underneath his touch and shifts his hands appropriately to better fit his body. When he feels he's gotten a good enough grip, he slides his hands over and presses his fingertips into the muscle starting closer to the base of Dimitri's neck. His fingers make little circular patterns before squeezing slightly and rubbing the skin upwards. With the pads of his thumbs he rubs even smaller circles into the back of the muscle.

Dimitri exhales and Sylvain feels his body relax slightly. Sylvain makes sure to get a good motion going with his arms as he gets into the movements. His thumbs trail down either side of Dimitri's spine every now and then as the palm of his hand digs gently into the back of his shoulders. Sylvain can't say he has the most comprehensive knowledge of massage but he does think Dimitri does feel rather tense still. What is on his mind today? He wants to ask but he doesn't want to break the silence.

Neither one of them are going to rush this, so Sylvain takes his time reaching every little area of Dimitri's shoulders. The air conditioner stopped at some point so the only noise now is that of Dimitri. The occasional sighs and groans that spill from his lips is simply intoxicating and quite arousing if he's being honest. He would not be surprised if he had to rub one out after this.

Eventually, Dimitri does speak up. “Sylvain, do you... do you remember what we talked about?”

Oh, what's this? Sylvain smirks fiendishly. “We talk about a lot of things. Which thing was it?”

“You know, that one night when you told me about those things you liked.” His voice stutters, absolutely adorable.

Sylvain knows exactly what he's talking about but he wants to hear the words from Dimitri's mouth so he feigns ignorance and pretends to think. “Hmm, things I like.”

He can almost see the tips of Dimitri's ears reddening as the poor guy responds back. “How you wished to become intimate with me.”

“Intimate, huh?” His very tone is low and teasing as he whispers those words close to Dimitri's ear.

“Yes, I think that I would also wish to become intimate with you.”

“What exactly do you have in mind?” Sylvain's sure if he just pokes a little more he can get Dimitri to say something indecent. His lips are close to the nape of his neck, and the words spoken drift hot over already warm skin.

“I... I do not know. This is not exactly my area of expertise. I thought you would know. You had all those ideas.”

He's got Sylvain there, but still, “You've got to have some thing you really want to do.” Sylvain is sure he feels Dimitri shutter at those words. Surely Dimitri has to have an idea or even a feeling of something he wants.

“I only wish to be with you, to kiss you, and maybe to touch you. I do not know Sylvain.”

Ugh, he really is just too cute. Sylvain can't even bring himself to tease him further. “Dima...” His voice is husky as he presses his lips to Dimitri's neck. “Come on, let's take this to the bedroom.”

The two get up and make their way to Dimitri's room. Though, Sylvain takes a quick detour into his room and comes out holding a bottle of his favorite lubricant that he fished out from under his bed. He walks over to sit on the bed next to Dimitri. He looks very nervous. “Luckily for you, I do have a plan.” Sylvain smiles and that does seem to have eased Dimitri some. “I don't want you to overexert yourself or do anything you're unfamiliar with, so I will be taking the lead throughout the whole thing, okay?”

Dimitri just looks at him and nods his head. He shuffles a bit and licks his lips as well, and Sylvain realizes he better start before Dimitri shuffles out of his skin. He starts by taking off his shirt in one fell swoop and turning to Dimitri who's looking at him expectantly. “We can start with something you're already pretty good at now.”

Before Dimitri can respond, Sylvain leans forward and brings their lips together. It's soft at first but Sylvain takes the initiative to mouth and nibble on Dimitri's lips, enough to try and rattle him. Dimitri suddenly falls in line kissing back, and Sylvain can feel his tongue grazing the bottom of his teeth as he opens for him. The kiss leads into a tiny moan as Sylvain starts to caress Dimitri's thigh through his sweatpants starting near his hip bone and slowly tracing its path inward.

Dimitri is a messy kisser, of that there is no contest, but he's nothing if not passionate. Sylvain has kissed a lot of different people in his life and knows that skill counts for nothing if there's no feeling behind it. It's easy to fake a kiss, most people would never know. Sylvain could always tell though, and it caused a lot of breakups back in the day.

Slowly, throughout the kiss, Sylvain is leaning more and more into Dimitri, leading him down onto the bed until Dimitri's back touches the sheets. They're still exchanging everything from breath to spit, and he knows Dimitri doesn't quite want to stop but he pulls away anyway to rearrange his mouth farther along his face to the spot under his ear. Dimitri laments at the loss of his mouth with a grumble and it causes Sylvain to laugh onto his skin. His lips trail kisses all down Dimitri's front while his free hand continues to roam along the inner parts of his thigh. That's when he feels it. The sweatpants, as unsexy and bulky as they are, cannot possibly mask the visible arousal growing within Dimitri.

Sylvain doesn't think he's seen Dimitri naked since they were kids. Once they started to get older, Dimitri got all embarrassed and proper about the whole thing even between the two of them so it was never a topic Sylvain pushed even in jest. Now though, Sylvain couldn't help himself, he had permission after all. He stroked down the length and it caused Dimitri to shutter, a sound which gave Sylvain goosebumps. Now he just had to ask. “Dima, how often do you masturbate?”

“I... not very often.” His voice comes out quiet. Maybe he feels ashamed.

“Have you done it recently?”

Dimitri's face grows scarlet at the question. “Yes.”

Oh, now this is getting interesting. He has to know. “When?”

Dimitri averts his eyes when he answers. “Yesterday, when you were at work.”

Damn, Sylvain can't believe he missed that! “Did you think about me at all?” He says with a sly wink, he absolutely has to know.

Dimitri takes a minute and Sylvain isn't sure if he's actually going to answer until he exhales. “Yes.”

Oh wow, Sylvain's heart soars when he hears that word and he even feels his face flush. “Dima.” He nuzzles his face into the crook of Dimitri's shoulder affectionately. Dimitri was thinking about him at a time like that. Not that he hadn't suspected, but to hear the confirmation, it sent an intense wave of desire coursing throughout his body.

Sylvain sits up now and wrangles his pants off of him, tossing them haphazardly onto the floor. His underwear follow soon after. Sylvain is hard, probably just as much as Dimitri is, and laser focused on what he wants. And what he wants right now is for Dimitri's cock to be buried so far inside of him that he can't breathe.

Now Sylvain is not exactly a stranger to anal play, he's experimented before. Starting college he was open to trying new things, maybe not with people but trying things still. Him and a few of his friends at the time had been joking around and he'd been dared to buy a dildo from a sex shop. A bet that Sylvain had of course won. It sat hidden in his room for months before curiosity had gotten the better of him and he discovered he actually enjoyed it quite a bit. The rest, of course, was history. He might have only had that piece of silicone for reference but he's confident he could take Dimitri.

That was of course until he actually got his hands on the edge of Dimitri's waistband to rid him of his pants, and the monster he was hiding popped out. Fuck, Dimitri wasn't wearing underwear underneath his sweatpants and he was absolutely hung! Sylvain's eyes were glued to it, he was just so thick and now he was doubting himself.

“Sylvain, you're staring at me.” Dimitri's voice was a whine of embarrassment and when Sylvain looked back up at him he was covering his eyes shyly.

No, he would absolutely not let this stop him, he told himself. Sylvain never backed down from a challenge. Especially one involving showing his boyfriend the single most amazing night of his life. He found his voice again as he attempted to coax Dimitri back out of hiding. “I'm sorry, Dima, you've got the biggest cock I've ever seen.”

This of course caused Dimitri to groan into further bashfulness.

“And I'm going to stick that inside of me.” His voice is hot and low, absolutely determined to see this through.

“You can not be serious?!” Dimitri almost seems distraught at the idea.

“I am absolutely 100% serious, unless you're not into that.”

“I-I never said that. I'm just—I do not see how it could—” He stops himself there with a gasp as Sylvain takes hold of his length with enough force to get his attention.

“Put a little faith in me Dima, I've got some ideas.” Sylvain leaned over the side of the bed and grabbed the bottle he had brought in with him. “I've been told with enough lube, anything is possible.”

First thing's first though, Sylvain takes the remainder of Dimitri's sweatpants off of him. He suddenly remembers that Dimitri wasn't wearing underwear underneath all of that and grins to himself. “You really were expecting something, weren't you?”

It seems that Dimitri does not want to answer that, as he huffs further into his hands which are covering just enough of his face to not see the expression he's making.

“Well I like this Dimitri, he's a little naughty.” Next he set about finding a comfortable position kneeling as he uncapped the bottle and slathered the contents between his hands. He found it easier to approach himself from behind so arching his back a little he set about to work. His slicked up fingertips circled his rim greedily playing with it. Regardless of the situation he was in right now he still liked to take his time after all. Soon though, with a deep exhale he took the first finger in all the way up to the second knuckle. From there it was pure muscle memory, stroking and working himself open for more.

When his eyes finally fluttered open he could make out Dimitri absolutely slack jawed, his only pupil fully dilated and focused. Sylvain's stomach summer-salted at the sheer thought of pleasuring himself in front of Dimitri. It wasn't quite in shame, goodness knows Sylvain had almost none of that, but there was something about the way Dimitri watched him that made him want to put on a show. He'd never performed for anyone before and immediately he started to think of things he could do to improve the this. For example, he moved his legs further apart and put a bit more of an arch into his body hoping it would increase visibility.

One finger was easy, Sylvain thought with a huff as he lubed himself up more and a second finger entered his body. Thicker, better, more things you could do with two after all. Sylvain could tell that Dimitri was absolutely enraptured in his display, he even caught the other with his hand on his cock and smiled to himself.

His body was already trembling slightly, probably from holding his body in such an angle for so long but he was ever the achiever. His fingers pumped and scissored at his hole without remorse. That's it, still a long way he told himself urging his body on.

It was about this time that Sylvain became aware of the almost raspy voice of Dimitri. “Sylvain.” When he looked at him again, Dimitri's eye was flitting rather quickly from his face to his hole. He opened his mouth as if to say something more, and Sylvain slowed down and gestured to him with a look. “Sylvain... would you—I mean will you let me touch you.” As if his entire body couldn't get any more flushed, the tips of his shoulders burned pink as he asked.

“There isn't anything you can ask that I would not let you do.” He said with a smile. “You stay there.” Sylvain leaned back up as he removed his fingers from him. He then grabbed the bottle of lube with his free hand and passed it to Dimitri. “Use as much as you want, I don't mind.” Then he flipped around so he couldn't see Dimitri's face anymore and slowly backed up towards him. “I-uh I don't want to sit on you or anything not that I'm against that, but just let me know when I'm good.”

“You are good Sylvain.” He heard the other stammer after a second or two

Sylvain could finally lay down in a somewhat comfortable position, as he laid his upper body onto the sheets giving Dimitri free range to his backside. He did not have to wait long for Dimitri to get right into action, as he felt a single finger at first slide into him with ease. He thought he might have heard Dimitri say something quietly but a second finger joining the first sent him silent. Now that two of them were there, he came to notice that Dimitri's fingers felt quite a bit different from his. Not really thicker or longer but just different and most importantly he wasn't in control anymore.

A rush of shaky air came out of him as he felt Dimitri explore his body. His body seizes with a jolt as a finger grazes his prostate. This causes Dimitri to immediately stop.

“Sylvain are you alright?!” He says with slight panic in his voice.

“Calm down Dima, it's just my prostate. You're fine. If you find it again curl your finger a bit and press into it but don't spend all of your time there either.”

“R-right.” Dimitri continues stretching him out again. Every now and then he will timidly bump into that bundle of nerves and send Sylvain alight with pleasure. He even becomes emboldened to add in another finger and an absolutely throaty moan escapes Sylvain's lips. Good boy Dima.

Sylvain finds himself gyrating his hips ever so slightly into those fingers. He hates how impatient he's getting now but it feels so good that he can't stop. His body yearns to take all of those fingers as deep as possible and he's starting to think even Dimitri is beginning to realize this.

“Sylvain... do want you—that is, do you think it's good enough now?”

With a heave, Sylvain brings his body back up. He'd be lying if he said he wasn't nervous, but it's probably fine. He's careful to flip his body around again and he's greeted to the lovely sight of Dimitri alert and simply blissed already. “Just you wait, Dima. This is where the fun really begins.” The amount of lube he adds to Dimitri's erect cock is generous at best and excessive at most but he's not about to mess this up as he strattles the other's body, lines things up, and is suddenly reminds himself yet again just how big Dimitri is.

Big breath, in and out. With hands holding himself steady, Sylvain slackens his body and he can feel the tip breach that rim of muscles. He chokes back a gasp upon entrance, but he closes his eyes and forces his body to relax around the massive intrusion. He can feel his legs shake and his breathing goes choppy too but he keeps going, inch after inch without knowing where it will end.

“Sylvain?” It's Dimitri, who looks absolutely worried out of his mind. “How are you?”

Sylvain laughs half out of nervousness and half at Dimitri's choice of words. He must be really worried but he's trying his best because he knows how stubborn Sylvain can be when he puts his mind to something and know Sylvain won't stop now. “Don't you worry about a thing Dima. I'm just realizing there are just more inches of you than I expected is all.”

Eventually Sylvain does bottom out and he feels stuffed and euphoric in the fullest sense of the word. His heart is thundering in his chest. “Okay, see that wasn't so bad.” Whether he's talking to himself or Dimitri is anyone's guess. “Just gonna sit here for a sec, yeah?”

Dimitri nods back at him repeating, “Yeah.”

Now that Sylvain's gotten a good look at him, he can tell he's not the only one experiencing this euphoria. Dimitri is just glowing and also he can't keep his hands off of him, stroking little circles into his thighs with his fingers.

“You feel so good.” Dimitri mumbles dreamily.

Sylvain strokes the side of Dimitri's face tenderly. “Do I?”

Dimitri completely moves into the touch. “Yeah. Hot and tight.”

Sylvain feels absolutely privileged to hear those words come out of Dimitri's mouth. He knows he'd never hear them if they weren't both in such a heightened state of consciousness so he'll take what he can get.

“Sylvain, my heart feels like it is going to tear right through my chest. We-we are actually doing this.”

“A little late to notice but yeah, we're really doing this.” He pauses and wonders if that came out a little too insincere. “My heart is going crazy too though. I've never been with someone like this before.”

“Wait, never? But you have so much experience. You've had so many other people before me.”

“They never got very far. Kissing, second base, a mediocre blow job, that's as far as any of them ever got.” He snorts halfheartedly thinking back on all of it. “After most of my superficial romances fizzled out I guess I stopped trying. It's like, nothing really felt as good as I wanted it to feel.”

“Is this, as good as you hoped it would feel?”

“Oh Dima, how could you ask me that? Of course, of course.”

“I would not blame you if you did not enjoy it. I am unaccommodating and inexperienced.”

Sylvain shifted with a groan and leaned forward enough to reach Dimitri's lips in a passionate kiss while his hands held him up, boxing Dimitri on either side of his head. “Hey, I'm right here with you. We're doing this together after all.” He smiles before giving off a wink. “Plus I'm so in love with you, you could destroy my asshole and I'd probably thank you for it so please don't worry about it.

With that Sylvain gets back into position placing his hands on Dimitri's chest for leverage. “Here goes nothing.” He says with another smile as he begins to grind his body up and down in slow little motions. Sylvain is focused but he is also easily becoming undone with every jostle of his hips. The slow movements turn into larger ones that turn back into small ones curving like a roller coaster and it's taking a lot just to keep his pace.

Dimitri still can't keep his hands off of him, but also doesn't exactly know what to do with them either, so he just ends up grabbing and stroking whatever piece of Sylvain he can get a hold and it's admirable. Neither of them are saying much either between all the panting and whining the two of them are doing. To say it feels amazing would be an understatement. Dimitri is so big there's almost no getting around that and Sylvain finds when he curves his body on his way down it's impossible to miss his prostate. It feels absolutely unreal and he feels so close to release.

“Sylvain.” Dimitri mewls at him with the impatience of a child. “I want up. I want to be closer to you. Can I?”

Sylvain almost laughs at the request, almost. Of course he can. They do more shifting and Sylvain helps Dimitri up into a sitting position. Immediately Dimitri's lips are upon him. Hotter and even messier than before all of this. One of Sylvain's hands goes into Dimitri's hair which is still a little damp and oh so chaotic now. The other one makes its way onto Dimitri's shoulder and he's careful to touch every inch of it. He feels Dimitri's hands go further down his body until they're cupping his ass and it causes him to gasp into the other's mouth.

Drowning in pleasure, the two of them continue to kiss and rock and grab giving each other everything the two of them have to give. It's anyone's guess who will cum first until Sylvain's breathing goes off the scale and with a sob of pleasure, his body constricts and ejaculates onto Dimitri's chest. Dimitri doesn't last much longer and he practically roars as he finally cums deep inside of Sylvain pumping him absolutely full.

The two immediately collapse in a big sticky mess. Sylvain groans, coming down from his high, it suddenly feels like his soul is leaving his body. “I think I'm going to need another day off tomorrow.”

“Do you think we are exempt from our stretches for a few days?” Dimitri asks back.

“Boy, I sure hope so!” The two suddenly begin to laugh. “But seriously though, I'm gonna need to take it easy tomorrow. I feel so sore already.”

“You were so good Sylvain. It was amazing!” Dimitri is suddenly starry-eyed and grinning. “We will have to do that again.”

“One step at a time. Give me a little time to recover and we can work on that. Or you know, we could also switch positions some time.” Sylvain grins back at him and Dimitri goes red all over again. “You know I'll treat you so good Dima.”

Dimitri doesn't put up any fight at the idea, and this suddenly causes Sylvain to go red in the face too.

“We can, you know, work up to that. No hurry. It took me a while to get comfortable enough to ride my toys after all.”

“You really have those things in your room?”

“Oooo do you want me to show you where they are so you can comfort yourself when I'm not home?”

“Sylvain! I did not—that is not what I said!” The fact that Dimitri can still get this riled up after sex is truly a testament to his stamina.

After a while, Sylvain is starting to get some of his energy back. Dimitri has shrunk considerably and Sylvain is making an absolute mess of the bed. Great, gonna have to clean those sheets.... tomorrow. Maybe they can get away with it by sleeping in Sylvain's old room tonight. They've been too lazy to disassemble the bed after all.

Sylvain gets up and wobbles his way to the bathroom to clean himself off. He's sensitive to the touch but otherwise uninjured and says a little prayer to any wandering sex goddesses that might be happening by for a speedy recovery. When he comes back into the bedroom, Dimitri is practically passed out.

“Dima, you can't go to sleep yet. We need to move beds.”

Dimitri grumbles as if to say he isn't moving and Sylvain sighs. He cleans him up with the warm wash cloth, and after putting it back, finds Dimitri has not changed his stance on hopping beds. Their compromise is that Sylvain strips the bed of the fitted sheet, pushing Dimitri to either side of the bed as needed. He then lays the messiest bundle of blankets down, which Dimitri immediately crawls into. With a sigh and a smile, he removes his glasses and sets them on the side table before crawling into the mess of covers alongside Dimitri.

As Dimitri clings to him in his sleep, he can't possibly find himself upset with him anymore. Sylvain kisses him on the forehead with the last of his strength. “Goodnight, sweet prince.” He whispers into the dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's done, it's over! I'm sooooo happy to have finally seen this to completion. I'm sorry this chapter has been a long time coming but I hope you will enjoy it. If you enjoyed this at all let me know. I had to stop myself every couple of paragraphs because I just get all filled with emotion. Love these two trucks 
> 
> I have about a dozen other ideas and prompts I have bumping around my head so we'll see how that plays out.
> 
> Long live the Dimivain nation!

**Author's Note:**

> BTW the title is totally from the Capital Cities song of the same name. I always think of Dimivain when I hear it ;w;


End file.
